Lost Souls
by LumiVeex3
Summary: After the war, the world was supposed to be perfect - but for some ninja, purposelessness prevailed. Sakura, left alone once more, finds emptiness at every turn, while Kakashi has known nothing but war, swallowed in a peaceful abyss. Finding comfort in helping two of their best friends fall in love, they discovers their own happy ending along the way. [KakaxSaku] [SasuxNaru]
1. Chapter 1

When the war was over, Sasuke and Naruto bloodied, bed ridden but still laughing, Sakura thought she had won. Peace was upon them, Sasuke was home. The world was beginning to feel like the one she had pictured so long ago - but then Sasuke said he had to leave the village. That he did not belong there right now, and that he had to atone for his sins before he could sleep peacefully protected by nin he could've remorselessly executed.

When he said that, her heart ached to new lows, as the happy ending she had already begun weaving in her mind began to unravel with painful quickness. When he said that, she begged him to stay until they could create a proper prostetic for him. When he said that, she cried against his chest and pleaded. Flashes of their childhood came to her in waves, of how similar this all felt. How much horror that had brought to her life. She would fight him! She wouldn't let him go! Not again. Not when she loved him, loved him so much.

Naruto was the one to hold her. "Let him go," He had that brave voice on - the one that made you want to believe him when he said he knew what was the right thing, "Sasuke-kun. Your home will always be here, no matter how far you go."

"To hell and back you brought me here," he had broken the slightest grin, "Farewell."

Before Sakura could move, he was gone, and bless Naruto for the beating he took after. He let her let it out, let her hate him for letting him go. For holding her back from following him. He had let her hate him, so that she didn't have to hate Sasuke. That was how she knew, these years later, that he really had loved her, but never in the way she thought.

She had thought she knew so much then. But she couldn't see past her own mind. She had told herself for years that Sasuke had kept his distance because he was afraid, he was hurting, too focused on revenge, too lost in madness - never, perhaps, that he had not reciprocated. That seemed so impossible - that a girl who would give up the rest of her world for a boy, could be loving someone who did not love her. That this wasn't a fairytale, a tv show, a movie, and that maybe, she wouldn't get her happy ending. When she found out he was leaving occasional notes for Naruto, but never contacted her on his journey, she found herself so confused she drank until it made sense. And she realized he didn't love her.

It was moments like that that broke her into reality, moments like that that broke her.

Sitting now at the crowded watering hole, her cheeks blushed, head slumped, years past, she wondered how she still wasn't quite over it. Not in a hateful way, no; In fact, she saw it so clearly now, the obvious reality of who he cared so deeply for, even though neither would admit it quite yet, but in an empty way. It was like she had poured all her love into a pit, and never got any back, never made anymore. Could it have been any worse? The boy who loved her and the boy she loved... Leaving her feeling discardable, useless, unloved.

Not much had changed from her childhood, no; Except now, much like her brilliant teacher, she could drink it all away.

Even Lee - she had thought of it, of trying, of forcing herself to smile when it required and to laugh when he joked, but even he, in heartbreak for his fallen comrade, had become so close to TenTen, that even he had abandoned her. Atleast that, she concluded, was deserved.

Of course, there were people who expressed concern - she could see the brows furrowed on Ino-chan's otherwise plain face, the way Naruto forced extra bubbliness in his voice. Kakashi would drop in on her, tried to get close to her, perhaps, feeling some guilt for never addressing her more prominently when she was younger, and feared this may have been his fault. But she shut him away too - he had no reason to feel guilt, because she never blamed him. She never blamed anyone - her sadness was her own.

"Ya~! We're closed. Go sleep somewhere else!" The older bartender slapped her hand on the bar several times - alerting the pink haired kunoichi that the lights were up, and she was totally alone. Hadn't she come with people? She guessed not.

The walk home felt longer and longer the more she walked. When she hit the edge of town, she stared at the gates and wondered if it was better to be like Sasuke - to run from all her problems and start again somewhere else. Somewhere where no one knew her.

"That's impossible!" She groaned, putting her head in her hands; She was of couse, part of the Neo-Sanin, and known around the world for medical prowess and physical strength. She tried to clumsily transform herself into someone else - to a girl with blue hair, brown eyes, beautiful, shorter and thinner, dainty and charming - but she was messing up the hand signs, and stuck with herself. "I'm drunk," She rationed; It was time for her to go home. Hadn't that been where she was heading in the first place?

"You do look a little flushed in the moonlight."

She jumped several feet back in alarm, but stumbled and was falling backwards when the same voice appeared swiftly behind her to catch her, "Sakura-chan, did you come to visit me on gate duty?" Her former sensei, hadn't meant to tickle her neck when he held her, but the haze of alcohol telegraphed it into straight electricity, and she found her footing as quick as possible.

"I'll admit, it is quite dull, the nightshift in a peaceful world; Nothing ever happens." He said it with a smile, but his eyes were duller than the edge of a well used kunai.

"I'm... Sorry, Kakashi-sen..sei," She paused, hating how her body betrayed her right now. Alcohol seeping through her system, she found that rolling off the tongue in an odd way. She was clearly far too lonely. "I need to be going now, one too many cups of sake, ha ha!"

"Grown woman or not, I believe it is my duty to walk you home, Sakura-chan. Is that okay?"

"No, really, I'm okay!" She laughed, taking off in a frenzy.

He appeared infront of her, haulting her hurried movements, "Your apartment isn't that way, Sakura."

She sighed. What fight could she put up then? She had fallen asleep at a bar, ended up almost abandoning her village, and couldn't find her house if she tried.

Kakashi-sensei made pleasant conversation the whole way back, but Sakura had lost herself in her own mind, and he allowed her to go there. Something had changed in her after the war, even though everyone had become so happy and content - she seemed... lost, or, in turmoil? He couldn't quite place it, and it bothered him so much some days he spent hours trying to figure it out. He had reached out, but she always shut him away.

How could he blame her when he did the same thing? He had had many more years of practice, however. He never left bars hours after they closed. No, he drank at home. No one ever asked.

She fumbled with her keys, placed her head on the cold wood of her door. Why couldn't she make her mind stop. Why couldn't she do anything right? like get her keys in a lock. Like be worth it to someone, like-

He touched her hand so gently, in her drunken sea of emotions she nearly cried right then. Placing them in her door, walking her in, he had stopped there, at the door. "Sakura-chan, please... be well."

He had turned then, and his leaving felt like just another exodus, one she just couldn't handle, and it didn't make sense and she didn't know what she wanted and she knew she was drunk, but before he could vanish in a cloud of smoke, she shouted, "Stay!" and it took them both sufficently off gaurd. Faster than she could think, and now she was hiding her face beneath her hair. Sober Sakura would kill Drunk Sakura in the morning, but maybe that would be a good thing.

He wasn't sure what she meant by that, but she sounded so desperate he couldn't quite leave. He turned to look back at her, to see her hiding, blushing, so unsure - it reminded him of her as a child, and how far she had come... To see her like this now, it wounded him.

"May I fix a pot of tea?" He asked, almost as sheepish as she; It was strange to admit that after all these years, he had never been in her apartment, and doing so at such a bizarre hour made him...uneasy. She was no girl anymore, after all.

She could only muster a nod, heading toward what he presumed her kitchen, drawing some water and fixing it on the stove. She wouldn't face him. "I'm sorry, I've had too much and was in my own head. Thank you for being kind enough to... to walk me home, to... not leave." As she struggled to form her words clearly and precisely, the tea pot was whistling away, boiling up, though she made no attempt to move it.

She knew she should, grab it, act normal, pull herself together - tell him to leave - but her hands, mouth, body, mind, all were frozen in place. One hand found her shoulder, the other the tea pot. "Sakura... What's come over you?"

She was sobbing then, all of her emotions bubbling out any orafice they could, turning her stone-walled facade into muddled mush before him. He tried to console her, but nothing stiffled her tears. He settled for holding her, guiding her toward the couch where she curled into a ball with her head on his lap; Sympathizing, he felt her pain all too well. Perhaps he couldn't place her source, but he knew that emptiness. He had grappled with it for many years before she, Naruto, and Sasuke had come along... Maybe, even now, though he would not admit it, that emptiness had crept back into his life, with the peace that had prevailed. Some ninja only knew how to fight. Kakashi was still learning how to do anything else.

Eventually, her tears slowed to a stop, and he realized she had fallen asleep. Although uncomfortable, any attempt to move her was met with a grunt and a determined kunoichi refusing to budge, so he accepted that this might be his resting place for tonight. As he began to drift, he wondered if Sakura would wake with a start and hit him - it was possible. So he decided perhaps it was better to stay awake.

He did a lot of staring at her, without much else to do, he found himself watching the way her lips twitched into a smile, then rested, having some sweet dream saving her from her personal torment. Her pink hair, though a mess, framed her face in just a way that made her look so at peace, so pretty despite her tear stained cheeks. How he had wanted to reach out and wipe them away, but he did not know the appropriate way to deal with his former student - or with women in general. He had formed personal bonds, yes, but ones that still, he found lecture and strife with, not nurturing and comfort. They had brought him joy, and perhaps he had brought them joy too, but the nature of his care for his students was... life and death, not emotional torment. Still, he had been preoccupied with Sakura's suffering for more than this evening. After all, he was thankful she was so drunk to believe he was on gate duty... a Hokage, on gate duty. He laughed to himself.

She had been sad for some time, but her spiral was only apparent these last few months; She still got up and went to work, still smiled when she said hello, her reports were all well detailed and clear, but something was missing when she performed any of these tasks. Some light, cheer, something so... Sakura, so obviously absent to anyone who knew her. He was ashamed he noticed it after Naruto pointed it out to him, but that spoke to what an excellent ninja she really was.

"Kakashi-sensei," He had stopped him in the doorway one night after a mission they had taken into the Land hidden in the Mist to bring back some rare herbs for a vaccine; Sakura had already departed, and Kakashi was taking his leave as well when Naruto's tone of voice spoke of some trouble - had the Land of Mist been doing something treasonous? A rising faction of infidels? He was waiting for his peace to crumble before him. "Sakura-chan is not well."

It had thrown him off - he had just seen her of course, and she appeared just fine. This was not nearly as serious as his voice had made it seem, so he thought. But Naruto had never sounded more convinced - even more so than when he proclaimed he would be hokage, and so Kakashi listened. "I don't know how to fix her emptiness. She seems lonely, even surrounded by people. She is not smiling as bright as she used to. She's smiling... But it's hallow."

Kakashi regretted his advice that day. "Maybe she just needs some alone time, Naruto. Adjustments to a war-less state can be hard for some nin. And Sasuke not staying probably didn't help anything."

But Naruto had protested saying it was more than that, and Kakashi couldn't offer too much more help other than that he would see what he could do. And he saw, but he could not do. When he noticed her vacancy, he had probed, shown her acts of kindness, assigned her interns to keep her tied down to people, to reconnect her emotionally, but nothing helped. These last few months her routine had been drinking herself to stupor at any watering hole that would take her, going home, going to work, and continuing on that way. Today was the first day she reached out.

As the sun came up, he created and dispatched a clone to go sit at his desk and make him look busy. He found himself playing with her hair, brushing it out of her eyes to see her face more clearly. She was far too beautiful to be so sad.

He hated that thought had crept forward in his mind, like a sneak attack from an enemy, pouncing at him in his weakest most tired state. She was not a girl, no, but he had been her teacher for christ's sake, and further, he was more than ten years her senior.

In his most honest state, he could admit that Sakura was one hell of a woman - slightly terrifying, but so very sweet, a delightful cook, and a delightful woman. Her healing powers were so much more than her training, it was the reassuring smile she gave patients, her kindness of finding the favorite foods of the sick and weak, her confidence that was transcending to all of her staff. In his most honest state with himself, he would accept that he had spent too much time admiring Jiraiya-sensei, and was becoming a pervy old man. A young mind, he said, but an old body.

Unfortunately for his old eyes, they had sagged before sunrise, and he woke to a startled Sakura fumbling off the couch, thankfully no fists his way. "Sakura..."

He could see her face trying to register what exactly had happened last night, and why her former teacher was in her apartment. "Sakura..." He didn't know how to phrase it in a casual manner, "You made some tea and fell asleep. I didn't have the heart to wake you. You looked at peace."

She turned from him, hiding the blush on her cheeks. The night was blurred, but she recalled crying, recalled shamefully asking him to stay. Recalled the first peaceful dream she had had in months - and who was in it.

"Well," She paused, "Thank you, for being kind enough to not wake me. If you don't mind, Kakash-sensei, I'll be late to work if I don't get ready soon."

"Unnecessary, Ino is filling in for a sick hospital comissioner," His words were meant to relax her, but she turned around in a flurry of fury, "She what?! Kakashi-sensei, that is completely pointless I am completely well and the hospital needs me-"

"Are you disrespecting an order from the Hokage?" He mused, somewhat entertained at her outburst. More flustered than before, she opened her mouth several times before huffing, "I don't need to be taken care of."

"Are you free for lunch, Sakura-chan?" Ignoring her entirely, she growled at him when she responded, "No, I believe I'm feeling under the weather today."

He laughed. "Right, right... Raincheck, then, I suppose."

Standing, he would've frowned at her had she been able to see through his mask. She looked as at a loss for words as he was, and he gave a slight bow before mumuring, "Feel better" and disappearing in a huff.

She has asked him to stay, she remembered that much. And he had. Perhaps the only person who would've. But his kindness was just that, as was there's... A substitute to hang over her misery one more day. Ah, if she could just be appreciative. Head against the wall, she hated herself - but more importantly, the headache that overwhelmed her. She poured herself a cup of sake to soothe the ache.


	2. Chapter 2: My How You've Grown

When your bones turn to dirt and dust, your name whispered far and few, if at all, will your soul be content with the life you lived?

Kakashi slumped over his desk, eyes growing tired. Being the Hokage was much more difficult than being ANBU, than being a Jounin - as in times of peace, their jobs eased, and it seemed his only exasperatingly grew in size, scope and responsibility. He was no good at paper work, and although he would never wish chaos upon the world once more... it was all the man knew. In war, he would've been a fearless and apt Hokage, a wise military general, level-headed and confident. He did not posess the same proficency in planning festivals and signing trade deals with local villages.

In fact, as the next heaping wave of paperwork for new building planning and budget requests from a million organizations that he didn't remember establishing all hit his desk at once, he sighed so loud Yamato, his ninja guard and close friend, peered in the room to check on him. "Everything okay, Hokage-Sama?"

"Everything except for the fact that you won't call me by my name, Yamato-kun."

Yamato sighed, "You know that'd be disrespectful. What's bothering you today?"

Kakashi wished he knew where to begin. It had only been three days since he'd left Sakura's home, but the whole experience was startling for him in more ways than one. That day he found himself introspectively distracted, and it had carried to the next day, and to now. He wanted to shake his fears for her, his fears for himself, and wished he hadn't sent a clone to see that she had gone to the bar the last two days... again, drinking herself into stupor quicker than usual. Although it was subsided, somewhere in him he still feared that he could not save the ones he cared for, and wondered what he could do. But, ah, how could he say that to his comrade? It would sound odd, to be so preoccupied with a several years former student.

"Yamato, would you sign these papers for me. I'll buy you dinner."

Before Yamato could refuse and say that was completely unethical, dangerous, reckless, and un-Hokage-like, Kakashi had vanished into a thick cloud of smoke. Had he still been there, he would've heard Yamato sigh and say that he shouldn't be going out with a guard of some type, and how duty with Kakashi was simply never simple. He mused what his problem could be today.

He disguised himself, then walked for some time. Walked past the schools, the parks, the recently constructed high rise apartments that looked so out of place in their timid town. Would the whole town look like this in ten years?

Heading into the market, he past stall after stall, smiled at a few familiar faces though they did not recognize him; Ino peddling her freshest flowers, TenTen her vast weaponry collection. He past an old woman named Haruhi, who today had a collection of trinkets all across her table. He found a necklace of painted pink flowers; it looked like cherry blossoms on metal branches. It reminded him of the troubled kunoichi and he couldn't help but purchase it. Handing Haruhi a heft sum of coins more than she requested, he picked up the necklace and put it in a pouch on his thigh.

"Finally got a girlfriend, Hokage-sensei?"

Although low enough for not many else to hear, it still caused Kakashi to jump.

"Ah, Naruto-kun, how did you know." A small smile spread over his lips, but he was truly doing his best to hide the blush on his cheeks.

"Well I know everybody in this town," Naruto shrugged, "And I heard from a stressed out Yamato that the Hokage was playing hookie today. Figured I'd find you in a tree reading icha icha, but then you know, next guess was being a weirdo in town."

A heavy sigh preceeded, "Years have not...tarnished your...charm, Naruto-kun."

They began walking, and Kakashi forced conversation to keep him from asking about the necklace, "Did you need me for something specifically today? I am very busy, Hokage is not all fun and games after all."

"So busy you're buying girly necklaces," He quipped, "Who's it for, huh?" Kakashi rolled his eyes, remaining silent.

"You're no fun," He lamented, "Come on. You're like my... cool older brother, I have a right to know these things."

"Considering I was your teacher I find that slightly odd?" Kakashi hoped his interest in Naruto's choice of explaination wasn't apparent.

"Teacher, shcmeacher. Don't get me wrong Kakashi-sensei, you'll always be super awesome and powerful in my eyes, but come on. I'm twenty one now. You're only what, like, 34? At this age, what's that to me. We fought the same war together, you know? I wouldn't call you my elder, you're not old enough to be my dad..." He shrugged, "Whatever. You don't want to tell me, fine."

He could see that at some point, Naruto had flustered himself, and he wondered if this was Naruto trying to open dialouge about someone he liked. Hinata perhaps? He hoped, for the girl's sake. He had seen his interest in Sakura fade as he pursued Sasuke and the protection of the village, so not her, he was sure, but, who? For some reason, although he knew someone adoring and needing protection may ultimately suit him best, he doubted Naruto would go for that type. In fact, he wouldn't be surprised if Naruto was lacking challenge as much as Kakashi was these days.

"Would you like to spar, Naruto?"

The blond's eyes lit up. "Training field 5, believe it!"

And so the two rushed off, Kakashi ditching his guise as they approached the field. It had been some time, and although he worried his bones may not be as limber as they once were, he was confident that he knew Naruto best by far, and that this battle should be an entertaining, if not easy, battle for him to win.

"The rules are simple," Kakashi yawned, feigning total disinterest, "If you can get the bells before sun down, I tell you who I was buying the necklace for. If you don't, you tell me why you're so curious about love."

Naruto stomped his foot much like his thirteen yearold self and rolled his eyes, "As if I'm curious about anything other than my shady sensei snooping around the village," Then added, "But fine. You have a deal."

While Naruto had been grumbling about his denial, Kakashi had signed to make a clone and had left it there, the real him vanishing through the trees. He was shocked when Naruto appeared infront of him, almost landing a fearsome punch on his jaw.

"That one's not going to work anymore, Kakashi-sensei!" They battled through the trees, "I've been tracking chakra signatures for some time now, I can smell a fake a mile away!"

Kakashi smiled. Yes, one day he would make a fine hokage. And while elated, he found it troubling that this would not be such a simple game of hide and seek. Who had the boy been practicing chakra tracking with?

"My you have learned something," Kakashi grunted, dodging a barrage of kunai, "Who have you been training with?"

The question seemed to catch Naruto off gaurd, and Kakashi used it to land a swift kick to his torso, sending him rocketing away. He focused his energy on surpressing his chakra, then blended into the trees to try and make a quiet escape.

When he reached his apartment, he sighed with relief. Naruto hadn't tracked him through the village, and he could hide out in there for some time, as he would certainly hear Naruto come through any window or door.

Turning the knob, Naruto was grinning at him. Caught so off guard, all he could do was stare at the silver bells now dangling in his face. "Getting old there, Kakashi-sensei!"

He sighed a heavy sigh. Yes, he was.

"Fine, Naruto, you win."

"So who'd you buy the necklace for?"

"Someone." Kakashi shrugged, pushing past Naruto into his apartment and fixing tea. He could feel the heat from the glare Naruto was giving him, and wondered when the boy would bother to grumble at him for his incredious response. He wasn't lying, after all. He did buy the necklace for someone.

"Why's it such a secret, huh?" Naruto prodded, "Is it Kurenai?!"

Kakashi whipped around so fast, Naruto narrowly dodged the hand that came his way. "Don't disrespect me, Naruto."

"I'm just saying it'd make sense why you're hiding it, jeeze," Naruto shrunk away.

"Why are you keeping your interests secret? You wouldn't answer who's chakra you've been tracking." Kakashi returned the questioning to Naruto.

"How's the planning for the Sakura Omatsuri going? I haven't seen any flyers yet." And he turned it right back.

Kakashi flinched. Although he wanted to laugh at Naruto's blatant deflection, he paled at the suggestion that there was a festival coming up. "...Yes, the festival, it's coming along nicely, you know. I just haven't had anyone put up the flyers, I'm waiting... to be closer to the date. To build excitement."

"Man it's like a week away! The excitement can't build much more!" Naruto laughed, "You must have something great planned. Anyway, can't wait to spot which girl's got on that necklace there, so I can tease you about it awhile."

He left, and Kakashi stared at his tea pot while it whistled, not unlike Sakura the other day, though with many less tears and alcohol. He sighed. What was a bigger issue - the fact that he realized he wasn't sure how to give Sakura that necklace now that Naruto assumed it was romantic - when it wasn't - or the fact that he hadn't started planning this festival, which was a week away. He felt like one problem should be bigger than the other, but they weighed largely equal in his mind. They both had to do with dazzling cherry blossoms, after all.


	3. Chapter 3: Dynamic Shifting

A/N: Thank you for the positive reviews I've garnered so far! I have missed this website so much and am very happy to be back. Although it is progressing a tad slowly, I think exposition into both of the characters and both the foiling of their similarities and contrasts are an important basis for the story at large to take root. I hope you are nonetheless enjoying the dialogue, slow blooming fluff and inevitable angst of shinobi trying to adjust to a warless state. Much love to everyone reading, you have all inspired me to keep going and reinvest my time in something I love.

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Sitting in another smoke filled bar on the fringe of town, Sakura wondered if she just wasn't built like other people, if real life wasn't for her the way it was for some. Why couldn't she just go to work, go out for one drink with friends, go home happy? There were men in this village who would die for a chance to be with her - a few she knew too intimately - but she couldn't make herself play nice and get to know them. They felt foreign. They hadn't experienced her horror, hadn't seen the magnificent things she had seen. They did not admire the sheer will of humanity to survive in the same way she did - even if her will was fading out day by day.

She was stuck; she couldn't seem to bring herself to expand her circle farther than it already was, but it was ever shrinking as people moved on in their lives and left her one by one. Many had tried, but no one wanted to hang onto an anchor in the middle of a sea. One day, she would find no one left, and perhaps then she would be at ultimate peace with herself and her decisions.

"Two drinks over here, then close the tab."

She knew the voice, knew she wasn't drunk enough to be imagining it. Having done her best to avoid the silvery sensei she had embarassed herself infront of, she was reminded that there was truly no hiding from a Hokage of his caliber. More so, it wasn't like she was expecting to be tracked, and didn't do anything to hide her chakra - though the thought that he might have just sensed her out brought a weird level of uncomfortableness and intrigue. Eh, rather, uncomfortableness, that described it. Yes.

She watched his hands as he poured her a glass of sake and then fixed his own, having already tossed coin over the counter.

"Is it politically correct for such a high ranking member of society to be seen at a dive bar?" She tried to sound confident when she looked up at him, but the questioning gaze he gave her came with such intensity she shifted unconciously further away from him in her seat, eyes returning to her glass. "What brings you here, sensei."

"Ah, you think I'm here to berate your drinking habits," He knocked back his sake and poured himself another, a soft laugh escaping his lips. "Rather, I am here because I need a drink. And a favor."

Sakura didn't believe him when he said he wasn't here to question her, but she prefered the out. She remained quiet, waiting for him to continue. She was warm from the sake, but just not enough sober or drunk to make her mind up either way on snarky comments, polite conversation, or which was actually correct.

"Ehm, well," he cleared his throat, "The Sakura Omatsuri is coming up," He paused, hoping for some reaction, "It seems I've forgotten about it."

"Egh?!" She sat up and found herself suddenly concerned, "That's our namesake spring festival. We're hosting Suna royalty this year! People from all over come to see out cherry blossoms in bloom-"

"And so I am asking for my favorite cherry blossom to please help rectify her old sensei's forgetfulness," He drank some more, "Consider it payback for... all those years of teaching."

She scoffed, "Count me out. I have a hospital to run."

"And I, an entire village."

She growled, "As you can see, I'm very busy."

"Yes, your liquid diet does seem to consume more and more of your time..." Kakashi dodged the violent girl's swift swat; She was ultimately, predictable - especially when intoxicated. "Come now, who better than the trainee of two seperate Hokage? Why, the village will be singing your praises. And I would owe you a great debt."

Sakura wanted to refuse him, but knew it was no use. He had made his mind up, was that it? But Kami - that was going to be overwellming. A week! To book performers, to talk to local businesses, to put the flyers up, did the guests of honor even have appropriate accomodations?! Oh, she would have to talk to Shikamaru - no doubt someone who was influential in getting the sand siblings to come. "Call Naruto! He wants to be hokage so bad!" She groaned into her hands, having already accepted her fate.

"You're the only person I trust to get the job done, Sakura."

She also knew if she refused, he could order her, but she doubted he'd do that. He was either calling her bluff so hard, or he really didn't want to make her do something she didn't want to do.

"If anyone else asked me," She mumbled, "I wouldn't even think about it."

Kakashi pulled his mask down and smiled at her, catching her rather off gaurd. It was genuine - from his eyes to his cheeks, it took over his whole face. "You're the best, Sakura-chan."

She blushed, smiling a little to herself. "You're welcome, Kakashi-kun."

Although she hadn't noticed her slip, it did not fall beyond Kakashi to notice the change in honorific that she had made. It was already a tad peculiar that all of his students had elected "sensei" over "sama" - arguably disrespectful, but much more arguably just how the three operated - but tonight, she had called him "kun".

She insisted on ordering one more round while they "discussed the festival", which he accepted, but before long they were laughing about something and reminsicing war stories from when they were younger. Kakashi found himself raising his hand for another before his brain could catch up - so much for not encouraging her drinking...

"There was that one time, we hired that photographer to see you without your mask..." She chuckled, "So determined, and such bad ninjas. To think at that age what we fought... Shikaku, Orochimaru... But we couldn't even see you with your mask off!" She sighed then, "Well, what Sasuke and Naruto fought. I was... so peripheral back then."

"Sakura, they had gifts," Kakashi frowned, "They were... destined, troubled, they required so much more teaching and I wish I had devoted more time to you, because you were not below average, you weren't anything other than a typical twelve yearold genin, but I needed to make sure they-"

"Didn't destroy the whole village or the world." She shrugged him off, "I get it. I'm not bitter, just, observant."

"Honestly, when Tsunade decided to train you, I had become so entranced in the unravelings that had befallen the village... When you came back, you were a different person. You grew more than either of them ever did, because with no advantage at all, no kekkei-genkai, no abnormally large amounts of chakra - you stood their equal, where you stand today. What Sasuke lost - his cool head, his calculated maneuvers... You gained that. When Naruto lost direction, you lead him. It was... the most impressive thing I've ever seen. Neither of them could do what you're doing today, you know that."

Drinking more, she paused to consider what she could reply. "Perhaps, management never suited them. But I couldn't have saved the world."

"You save someone's world every day."

There it was again - that heated look that spoke of too much seriousness, too much honesty for the pinkette to handle right now. She turned from him and to her drink, and he wondered if he had been too forward. Was he making her uncomfortable? He had meant it, and he wouldn't apologize.

Had he ever even had a drink with her before?

Yes - once, he could remember, for Naruto's birthday. Sakura had already been of age for some time, but Naruto was so eager - he was blindly drunk by 9, and Kakashi and her had later carried him home. But no, they had never been inebriated together. Was he drunk? He paused. Not quite, he rationed, no. But... still, he wouldn't have been so bold - or so hyper critical of himself - had he been sober... so...

"That photographer you hired," He laughed nervously, trying to shift away the conversation, "That was me, by the way."

A loud thunk of her head hitting the counter first alarmed him - but her uncontainable laughter eased him slightly. "Of course it was," She chuckled, "You think of everything, don't you."

"Eh, not everything," he sipped his sake with a grin, "I did forget an incredibly important festival."

"You're gonna owe me big time for that," She laughed, "Big time. Big. Time."

"What do I owe you?" He mused, leaning a little closer than he intended, causing her to retreat.

"I don't know. You think of everything," She defended quickly, pink cheeks from something other than sake, "Think of that too. But it better be worth it. I'm going to want to die more than I already do." She laughed into her drink, but Kakashi didn't. Yes, that's right. Other people just didn't understand her humor.

Another reason she was alone.

"Hokage-sama, forgive me, but it is quite late..."

The two looked around to an empty bar, and Kakashi found himself rather embarassed. It was most certainly inappropriate to be out this late at a drinking establishment, especially with a woman, who was his student, who-

He shook off his own thoughts and handed the woman more coins. "Bartenders tell no tales?" He pulled his mask down to flash a dazzling grin, and Sakura fake gagged. Flirting with an older bar keep to keep his late night drinking spree a secret? Low of lows, sensei.

This time when he walked her home, she was able to clumsily get her keys in her own door without his help. As she waved him off, not intending on asking him to stay again - inner Sakura groaned at the mortifying thought - he caught the door with a bashful smile. "Thank you for tonight, Sakura-chan. I haven't laughed like that in a long time. Being a Hokage is... rather boring, to be honest."

She giggled at how truly unsuited for the task he was. No, without question he was the most experienced, talented, level-headed, brillant ninja of an entire generation in the Leaf - but to waste that talent on filing papers and building bridges... He must hate it. "Tsunade didn't find it all that appealing either. But uh, you're welcome. I don't...usually have company, so, thanks."

He nodded at her before turning to take a slow walk home, still warm and buzzing, wondering what had gotten into him lately. Yes, he had finally gotten a sliver of insight into her true pain; Yes, he had come up with a strategic plan to rid himself of the insurmisable task of planning this festival while no doubt forcing her to do something with her evenings other than get insatiably intoxicated; Yes, he had wanted to check up on her today after her repeated unchanged behavior after the other night. And yes, he felt like he had gotten a little bit further today into opening her up in a way she had always refused to - but was he doing this for Sakura, or because he too, had become incredibly lonely?

He had meant it when he said he hadn't laughed like that in some time - although his job gave him fulfillment, to see the growth of the city, to see his friends all relaxing their far too weathered bones, it was, without doubt, satisfying – he himself had never sought out a more personal sense of fulfillment, a family, close bonds, someone dear. It had seemed, at best, elusive, and he couldn't place why.

Truly he never felt connected to people in the ways many were. Not on a truly intimate level. He had been intimate, of course, but, not romantically so - not really ever. And Sakura, why, he guessed maybe in his still drunk state that she was easy enough to practice with - he wanted to make her happier than she was, and he enjoyed her company, but it would never get too troublingly serious because Sakura never would look at him like that. Yes, perhaps one day Kakashi could see himself more normal around women.

Somewhere in the trenches of his mind, it troubled him how preoccupied he had been with her, for so long, but he rationed that Naruto felt the same way and he did not have feelings for her. It was normal, to have known someone for so long, to care about their happiness. This was just the way things were, and it did not make him odd.

Right?

Sliding into bed, he shut his tired eyes and prayed for a simpler tomorrow, but smiled knowing he had helped someone, atleast a little bit, today.


	4. Chapter 4: PreparationsHesitations

A/N: A little bit of a slow build this part, BUT in my headcanon for this couple I think it's always been important for me to think about how they get where they're getting, and who they are in this post world peace, and how they aren't exactly the right cut pieces for the puzzle, are all other factors I'm trying to flesh out. Bare with me. The next one is filled with clumsy cuteness, awkward misunderstandings and all our favorite nin. This will make that even more enjoyable!

* * *

Sakura had been sober three days.

She had also been sleepless for three days, but Kakashi would call the victory for what it was - she wasn't sleeping at bars, atleast.

"Ieeeee-no-chan!" She sang, bustling through the flower shop doors, arms full of papers, "Oh thank goodness it's you today and not an associate, I have a favor to ask you see; I have some designs I need, need, neeeeeed you to get done-"

Ino watched her friend's lips move but didn't quite process anything she was saying. She was moving a mile a minute, and it had already taken Ino off guard to see Sakura before some bizarre hour of evening, but this confusion did not slow Sakura at all; "The festival is in four days, short time I know, but - well," Ino's eyes scanned the pages of sketches Sakura had done, and she turned white as daisies.

"That's not funny, Sakura!" She scolded, "Don't kid about an order that size-"

The pinkette paused, realizing she was talking faster than Ino could grasp the dire situation. It was possibly the first breath she had taken in three days. "Hokage-sama has sent me on his behalf to organize the festival. It's our biggest spring event and we'll be hosting nin from all over, including the Suna siblings-"

"Troublesome." A curt scowl came from behind the two girls, who had missed the bell ringing as Shikamaru had entered. "Ino, I'll come back later-" He had begun, but Sakura grabbed him before he could escape out the door.

"Shikamaru! I've been looking for you!" She began rapid firing her questions, seemingly forgetting just now how fast she was going for anyone beside herself. Had he booked accomodations for the sand siblings? Did they have allergies? A special dish they liked? Should she have an honorary kimono made up for Temari-chan? What did their schedule look like, so she could schedule events accordingly? How about-

Shikamaru trapped her with his shadow, both nin rubbing their temples. She sighed.

"Don't worry about them. It's not like a formal visit or whatever. It's fine."

"I know, but-"

"Sakura," Ino interjected, "Seems like Shikamaru is in charge of that. Which is one less thing you're in charge of, which with the amount of coffee you must have had today... should be a relief to you."

He released her, mumbling, "How'd you get stuck with that job anyway? What a drag."

"Seriously," Ino questioned, scanning the sketches. "This is next to impossible. I'll have to call in every employee I have for the next four days working around the clock... And still..."

"Next to impossible though, right?" Sakura was begging. Ino was slow to respond, but gave a nod.

And that was all Sakura needed, because she still had to talk to Ichiraku, to Sai about teaching an art class, all the vendors, Iruka's progress on the genin performance, her kimono being made, the Inuzuka family petting zoo...

Three days to get all that done. Oh Kami.

The day before the festival, Kakashi had begun to feel like his plan had backfired. It hadn't, and, rationally, he knew that. But perhaps in his "old" age he was mellowing too much - lately he was so much more emotional than he was used to, that being so selfish caught him off gaurd - but that's what this was, and his rational side could find no nicer name for it.

He felt like his plan was backfiring because he hadn't seen Sakura since he had assigned her the task of running the festival.

Kakashi did not like these feelings, not one bit. So he found himself actually devoted to his paper work - so much so it was peculiar to everyone in his cabinet. Even Naruto began to question if that "mystery girl" Kakashi had gotten the necklace for had dumped him - because Kakashi's affinity for avoiding administrative work was never so trumped than when he wanted to focus on whatever was bothering him.

And what was bothering him even more now was everyone questioning him what was bothering him.

Which is how he ended up outside of Sakura's apartment, wondering why he couldn't escape this weird thought-cycle, and how frustrating his life had become in just a few short weeks. Ah, but hadn't he wanted her to open up? It was like he had gotten what he wanted and wanted to give it back. Or did he?

He wanted to take a kunai to the throat right about now.

A swift knock stopped the thoughts and brought him back, forcing himself like this was a mission he needed to complete. He wanted to check on her, to get out of the office and be "normal" to everyone else, and, for himself, he wanted to see her.

"Kakashi-sensei, have you come to help bake? I could use some extra hands, if you couldn't tell-"

She looked like she hadn't slept in days, and for the first time his rational side dared ponder if his irrational side was right - had his planned backfired?

In her kitchen were five other Sakura's, one prepping, one stirring, one baking, one cooking and one plating all the goods she was making at unfortunately alarming speeds. In her living room, foods of all kinds were overflowing.

"What is all this?" He was assaulted with smells that made him salivate. Pastries, fruit platters, salted and cured meats, bowls of rice and noodles waiting for further prepping.

"Well some of the town is doing specials, or offering something for free, but I thought we should have some goodies to give out! I remember when I was a girl, we would all trade little snacks in the village park, and my parents would buy me so many sweets - well, my dad anyway. My mom would say, "Just one Sakura! Or it'll go to your hips!" but at that age," She laughed nervously, "What are hips? I wanted to eat until my stomach hurt. Now, I regret it, but, hey! The cycle of life. Some little girl will have a bursting belly tomorrow if I have my part!"

"-Yes- but-" Kakashi couldn't keep his eyes trained on one of her. She was going out of her way, something so extra, and why? The festival would be fine, there were shops who could cater this, he could pay them to do it with the government money. Why had she… "Sakura, that's each family doing something small… This is… It's too much. For you."

He hadn't meant for her to go to this level when he asked her to draw together a festival. Something small would've done it. Anything really, and he would've been happy.

The real Sakura stopped what she was doing to smile at him kindly, "You said I'm the only one you trust to pull of a great festival. I can't let you down!"

He sighed. She had gone from incredibly depressed to incredibly manic, and the change shouldn't have surprised him. Would she fall somewhere in the middle when this was over? Was it up to him to try and see to that?

He decided to help her, and then ended up working side by side rather late into the night. He had planned to give her the necklace tonight - an apt reason to thank her for all her hard work, but when he had finished his last red bean pastry he had turned to see her slumped over the counter where she had been cutting apples.

"Falling asleep on me again, eh?" He whispered, scooping her from the counter, thankful she didn't stir. He wished he could sleep like she did. He assumed her bedroom was upstairs, and struggled to avoid the mass of food in her living room to bring her there. Fumbling to find the light to the room, he hesitated in the door when he turned it on. It was almost too personal to be there, and he was thankful she was asleep to not see the way his eyes scanned the room. He wished his sharingan still worked.

One would expect Sakura's room to be pinks and purples, pretty and dainty and soft, perhaps even girlish. He had expected that too, lots of lace and decorative pillows. But it couldn't have been further from the truth.

She did have a large dresser to store what was her massive wardrobe, but instead of perfumes and lip sticks, he found bottles and dirty plates. On the windowsill next to it her hairbrush rested in dusty bunnies, on the floor beneath it what appeared to be an ever growing pile of clothes.

Her walls were a deep blue, wood moldings looking worse for wear but nonetheless white. Her bed sheets were grey, her blanket a mess of silver and matte navy. It was like when she moved in, she had picked the most adult colors she could think of and put them all here. There was no reflection of her personality, except perhaps that she had undoubtably been trying to fit into a mold that just wasn't her - a trait Kakashi hated to admit was one she had carried all these years, and a tragic one at that, because when she was just herself, she was something completely unreal.

When he set her down and tucked her in, he was going to turn and leave but her side table caught his eye. More sake bottles, yes, but, underneath one was a photograph - a stack of photographs, in fact. From the rookie 9, to their team photo, silly selfies with Ino and candids of her going after Naruto. There was one of her looking at Sasuke… His eyes drifted to her and his heart ached for her, the way she had looked in this photo, taken by his bed side after he had lost his arm. He, sleeping, she staring down at him, so much concern, so much longing, so much… everything in her expression. So much, she had loved him so very much. He looked back at the girl again, lips pursed, so much worry passing through him. Would she be okay? Would she be able to adjust back into normal life? What if she didn't? What if she didn't want to?

What if she had thought all those things for Sasuke when that photograph was taken?

Kakashi didn't make that connection. He put the photos down with a heavy sigh, alarmed when dainty fingers curled around his wrist. Had she seen him snooping?!

No - she was asleep, reaching out in her dream for something he was sure. But still, she had her hand around his wrist, so close to his own, and it troubled him the way it made his heart uneasy. He pulled away quickly, disappearing in a cloud of smoke before she inevitably stirred from the jerking of her arm and the loss of warmth in her hand. The kunoichi looked around her room, wondering briefly how she got there, then fell right back asleep.

Yes, Kakashi had never really gotten very close to anyone, and he was coming to the conclusion that it was because these things were scary, and that they likely hurt. Kakashi had seen enough hurt without investing himself in people this way.

That didn't stop him from laying in bed wondering over that photograph. There was so much in her eyes - something he hadn't seen in years in her. Glimpses, yes, but, when she thought no one else was looking, there was a vacancy there. A tiredness - like breathing, smiling, laughing, were all impacting weights on her chest, labors which were crushing her day by day.

It reminded him eerily of his father, and that had him pacing until sun up. She would be okay. She had to be okay. Right?


	5. Chapter 5: Sobering Senselessness

Kakashi was shocked that when he wandered to the center of town only a few short hours later, Sakura was already there, hair in a messy bun, yelling this way and that at genin, chunin, and jounin alike. Naruto and Kiba were struggling to carry a large glass tank, pacing this way and that as Sakura had a -very- specific spot she wanted it.

"Never be hokage, Sakura," Kiba grumbled, "The whole town would revolt."

"What was that, dog?!" She barked, and Naruto caught her before she landed a fist of fury on his jaw.

"Hey Sakura-chan, no hurting the help." He laughed, she sighed. An almost inaudable "sorry" came from her lips, and then her attention was on something else entirely.

If Kakashi had thought she was over doing it last night, he hadn't seen Sakura in true final form, because this... everything... it was... absurd, in the best way possible.

Corner to corner cherry blossom garlands were being strung. Their entrance gate was framed in a large white wood arch, not only dripping in beautiful flowers, but sporting Konohamaru, Udon, and Moegi looking filled with glee as they sprinkled incoming guests (and unexpecting nin) with flower petals. They were so light that although they did provide a beautiful veil for guests to walk through, the wind would whip them off the ground and was sprinkling them all over the village.

As the large tank he had absorbed began to fill with water, he realized it was a dunk tank. In the background, a large ferris wheel was being constructed. Where did she even get someone to build a ferris wheel?!

"Sakura-chan, this is amazing."

She smiled at him, giving a cute salute his way, "Don't even thank me. Thank everyone else! I couldn'tve done this without everybody!"

"Especially me!" Naruto hung on her shoulder, causing her to giggle.

"No, Sakura, thank you." Kakashi bowed to her, evaporating her smile and coloring her cheeks the same color as the blossoms swallowing the city.

"Ha- no, really!" She waved her hands at him, "It's no big deal!"

"He's got a point," Iruka was escorting a slew of genin past the scene, "I don't think our Hokage-sama has quite an eye for design like you." He paused to sniffle, "I'm so proud I taught you!"

"It does look great," Kurenai added, chasing after her toddler, "But my, Kakashi-kun. a bow so deep, you thought she might have saved your life!"

And then she was gone, meddling just enough and gone in a flash. Naruto added with a whisper, "Practically got him on his knees for you."

She elbowed him hard, her face now far closer to tomato red. "Thanks sensei - Oh, look at the time. I better go shower and change! Here, you can hand out the pamphlets with Naruto!" She shoved a whole stack of papers in his hands before he had even straightened out, and was gone before he could even protest - when would he give her the necklace? It was burning a hole in his back pocket. Had he said something wrong? The way Naruto and Kiba were snickering at him, he felt he must have. She had really come through for him - what had he done wrong?

"Sensei!" Naruto dragged his attention from his thoughts, "Stop the slacking. You already made Sakura-chan do everything." He teased, "Let's go greet some guests. Old Hokage, Future Hokage, you know? Dream team. Believe it!"

But- Ah, well, it would have to wait.

Sakura scrubbed all the sweat from her aching bones in a scolding shower. It was coming together. She hadn't thought it was possible seven days ago - but she had put together a pretty decent festival, and a couple of her superiors seemed really impressed.

Especially Kakashi, who was looking at her funny, and bowing way too deep for such a small task. And then there was Naruto, who she should've elbowed harder.

It was making her feel weird, and this was really the first time since she had cleared her mind of one substance and replaced it with adrenaline that her mind felt very present, here, reacting to something that had happened to her, and perhaps even the things that happened. Kakashi had shown up at her home last night out of the blue, and she hadn't even thought to ask him why.

Naruto had also asked her a weird question this morning - what gift would she find appealing if someone was interested in her? The question had puzzled her, and she wondered if Naruto was expressing his interest. It made no sense at all to her, because she had come to such obvious conclusions about him some time ago. But without alcohol in her system, her world seemed to be very inverted. Just yesterday, Lee asked her if she lost weight, because she was looking very slender - but not in a bad way, he had added - and then Kakashi this morning...

She shook her head. Her duties were not over today. Focus.

On her bed laid out her custom made kimono for this evening, a matte pink garment with gold silk trim, green and white blossoms along the bottom. Her obi was white with pink flowers, and she dangled several green charms off her front. She fashioned her pink locks into a neat bun at the base of her neck, leaving a couple strands up front - no, no, that looked messy -

fidgeting, she redid her bun twice, emerald green chopsticks holding it in place but never the -right- place. When she finally got that right, she spent five minutes deciding which shade of pink lipstick would match her kimono better - if one was too dark and loud, if the other was too bright and childish, if the third washed her out...

When had Sakura ever cared so much about her appearance? She was sounding like Ino-chan.

Hurrying up, she went to pop out her front door and was nose to chest with a chakra signature she could recognize anywhere.

"It's been some time, Sakura."

For a moment she was overwhelmed with her girlhood self, floods of memories coming to her in waves. She could hardly bring herself to look up at the dark haired shinobi infront of her. "Sasuke-kun," She let out a nervous laugh, "Surpressing your chakra signature, huh? It's rude to scare a lady you know!"

She could've expected any number of quips from the sarcastic, emotionally reserved boy, but she could not anticipate him wrapping his one arm tightly around her.

It took any words she might have had for him right out of her. What was in the water today? This couldn't even be Sasuke.

"I'm sorry."

What the HELL was going on today?!


	6. Chapter 6: A Ghost in Haunting

A/N: I'll be at NYCC this weekend and I know I was slow to update last week, so here is a second chapter! Enjoy. xx

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

"Sakura..chan," Sasuke hardly used honorifics, and the addition didn't make her feel at ease once he released her. There was silence. "The village," He added eventually, "It looks great."

His hesitation to speak brought her to reality. Yes, this was really Sasuke. And yes, he was an annoying little shit she loved. But she couldn't deal with that personally, and she was glad her rational side could accept that. "So we should go see it, Sasuke-kun? I'm happy you're home."

In reality, she could read him like a book. His posture was stiff - awkward and hesitant, like he didn't know what to say or do around her. He had not come here with words he anticipated her to like, and the fact there was no Naruto in toe made her pretty sure they were about to have the talk.

The talk. With a twenty one year old man.

Afterall, Sakura was the one who always accommodated him - even though she knew he had tried. He approached her first today, and apologized, and tried to compliment her, kind of. That was progress. However small.

First came the commotion, the laughter filled streets of running genin and strolling love birds, then came the overwhelming aroma that made her salivate. When had she eaten last? Lee was probably right - she hadn't allotted a lot of 'her' time, and she probably hadn't eaten since sometime yesterday morning. Hopefully. Now, she wanted to eat everything in sight. From mouthwatering skewers to savory sweets, all senses were being drowned in delightful delicacies. Even Sasuke, reserved, found his mouth watering. Wandering didn't do the belly any favors.

Her eyes were filled with wonder, watching what she had spent days slaving over turn into something she couldn't imagine. She had it in her mind, sure, but adding people - smiles, laughter, love - made her vision come to life in all the colors of the rainbow. They passed the dunk tank, where Hinata was trying, and failing, to knock Kiba in. Shino was buying her shot after shot, but after he realized she was never going to get it, she noticed him dispatch a few flying bugs to guide it to the target. Kiba's angry "You cheated!" as he splashed out only made a timid Hinata laugh harder.

"Would you like a sweet dumpling?" Sasuke paused at a stall, buying two sticks full of sweet dumplings.

"You hate sweets," She didn't lose her smile, still wandering the whole scene with her eyes.

"The second one isn't for me. I..."

Yes, that got her eyes to meet the raven's, and she saw... pure nervousness. "We should go find him then!"

Wow, if ever did a ninja react ungracefully - Sasuke jumped back so far he nearly knocked the whole stand of dumplings over, causing her to chuckle. Sasuke - too cool for you - Uchiha. When she was young she really bought that. When she was a teenager she didn't care if it was true because it was only part of him - but now, she could accept that was a total lie. A farce, an act - he was, in reality, no more cool than Naruto, just a much better actor. Most of the time.

"Sakura, I-"

"Sasuke-kun," She gave a knowing look, "Were you expecting something different? Me to cry? Beg? Assume it was... who? Ino? Karin?" She actually laughed at that one, but felt pretty bad for it. Really, were her and Karin any different? Sigh. Maybe she was too sleep deprived, or too inflated from being so proud of the festival, but she added playfully, "Come on, give me some credit. If it was gonna be a girl, it'd be me."

To say she was leaving the lone Uchiha at a loss was an understatement. Maybe he had expecting her to cry. What else could he expect? He hadn't seen her shifting personality. Her maturation or her demoralization. He had expected her to understand, sure - she was, in some twisted way, the closest thing he had to a female best friend... a sister... but... "When... did you know?"

"Some drunk night more than a handful of drunk nights ago," She waved him off, "You had left me. Naruto had let you go. He always knew you better. More faith, more loyalty, more understanding. Besides - he talks a lot. You write him an awful lot of notes, and you never write me."

He didn't see any sadness on her face, rather... amusement? At his bewilderment? "I came to terms with it too long ago."

"Is that why you still drink so much?"

She paused mid step. Had he watched her too? No. "Naru-chan writes about me too, huh?" She fake grinned, though her tone released nothing but ice. When she went to move on, he stopped her. Towering over her, she hated how there was still some part of her that stirred when his eyes met hers so intensely. "Naruto worries for you. I do, too."

"Well don't!" She used her strength to pull him forward, "I haven't had a drink in almost a week. What alcoholic can say that?"

"A good number," He didn't miss a step, "Sakura, what is it that pains you?"

She frowned. "I'm very happy right now, can we enjoy that?"

She didn't see the way his expression softened at her first admission of him being right. Naruto had not written falsely - and he had written about her constantly. Sasuke sometimes doubted that he was chasing the tail of a boy who had already been caught by another. Maybe that's why he kept running - to see how far Naruto would go. To know, without doubt, he was loved.

"Enough about me," She added at his silence, "Does he know? That you're home, or, you know..."

"No."

"Ah."

Sakura shook her head. Leave it to the boy in black to never speak his mind. Leave a million love letters, never say I love you. Foolish, but his arrogance was a hereditary trait.

"So you're gonna propose with sweet dumplings? You might do better with ramen." She jibbed. Sasuke gave her a look that said her playfulness was erring on irritating, but she shrugged him off. She had always been this way - just never toward him. Did he not like un-adoring Sakura? Because she didn't like being totally alone.

Okay, so maybe she was still just a -little- bitter.

But she really did want them to be happy. "Obviously you came to me to talk about it, so how can I help you?" Maybe he was expecting adoring Sakura, because she wasn't getting anywhere now. She stood in front of him and turned to him, leaning into his personal space, "Sasuke-kun, you know I'm teasing you. I would do anything for you, alright? I want you to be happy. I think it's great. I don't think you should be afraid. And certainly not of me!"

"Thank you," He gave her a nod, and poked her forehead, "Remember the same goes for you."

It was his turn to catch her off guard, she supposed. Yes, she felt... loved? Even if it wasn't how she wanted. It was... something. She supposed Sasuke would always be, in a way, just that person to her.

"Now don't go asking me for kissing lessons," She taunted.

"So you've been getting practice?" He leaned in, removing her from her arrogant power position, now she the one stumbling backward - it made him laugh. She huffed. Stupid boys.

All the while, across the square, Kakashi was gripping the necklace in his pocket, knuckles turning white. Watching a giggling Sakura talk to a smirking ghost from their past.

"Jealous, sensei?"

Kakashi would put a kunai through his throat if Naruto kept sneaking up on him like that. Feigning ignorance, Kakashi pulled out his tattered copy of Icha-Icha. "I was hoping they'd glance this way. I haven't seen Sasuke in such a long time, it's good he's returned."

"That's who you were getting all squinty at?" Naruto smirked, resting his hands behind his head, "It's alright if you're turning into a pervy old man, sensei. Seems to be a trend with you silver haired weirdos."

Kakashi flushed behind his mask. "Naruto-kun, shouldn't you be bum rushing your best friend?"

"I'm playing a game of hide and seek with him," Kakashi noted that Naruto was in fact, standing behind Kakashi while talking to him. Would he ever understand how 21 year old men who saved the world are playing hide and seek? Probably not. "He thinks I don't know that he's here. Like I couldn't tell his chakra from a nation away."

"So that's who you've been chakra tracking?" Kakashi raised a slender brow. Just then Sasuke leaned in to Sakura, and she jumped back, blushing and grumbling about something. Then they were on the move.

"Your jaw tightened there," Naruto sang, and Kakashi swore he'd kill him if he wasn't the Fourth's son.

"Naruto, while I appreciate your analysis on my clearly too boring for you love life, I don't know what you're getting at."

"You can lie to yourself all you want, Sensei - I've dealt with your type for yeeeeears," Naruto relaxed once Sasuke was out of sight.

"Naruto-"

"Naruto-kun. Hokage-sama." Gaara smiled at the two, giving a curt bow. "This festival is very pleasing. Thank you for inviting not only us, but our citizens here. It is a lovely reminder of what peace has brought our land."

Kakashi straightened up, trying to resemble something of his position. "Kazekage-sama. The pleasure is ours."

Kankuro was next to him, but Temari was missing.

"So Gaara-kun," Naruto winked, "I'm shocked you haven't sand coffined Shikamaru yet for touching your sister."

Deadpanning, Kakashi shouldn't have been surprised that Naruto had no tact with literally anyone, not just him.

"He will if he hurts her," Kankuro grumbled.

"I hope you won't consider it an act of war," Gaara smiled at Kakashi. Kakashi tried to fake a laugh, but it got stuck in his throat.

"Yes, an exception...?" He wasn't sure if they were kidding, but he hoped Shikamaru knew what he was getting into.

"Don't you worry," Naruto added, "Shikamaru doesn't put effort into anything. If he's willing to toe to toe with Gaara of the sand, he must love her."

Gaara smiled at Naruto, excusing himself then. Naruto left then too - leaving Kakashi more exhausted then he thought he could be from a series of conversations.

Was he jealous of Sasuke? Not because of Sakura, no.

Only of his youth.


	7. Chapter 7: Dobe

Hours later, she was exhausted. Physically? Sure, her chakra was shot working such long hours these past few days. But more so, emotionally. She usually didn't associate with people for so long and although she wanted to help anyone she could - she was helping everyone and she couldn't deal.

The balcony at the Hokage office had the best view of the city, of the festival she had set up that she had hardly enjoyed between worrying herself over everyone else. It was worth it, yeah - tonight just wasn't her night. It was Shika's, the village's, maybe even Sasuke and Naruto's.

But when would her night come?

The sun had set not long ago, but with it a slight chill overtook her. It wasn't quite summer yet, but they had dressed for it - her light yukata fluttered in the wind, rather drafty for such a cool night. Still, she would not trade her solitude.

It was only then that she didn't have to mask her mood, to hide how desperately she was seeking help that she refused to vocalize. She knew she needed it - but what she needed she couldn't just ask for. It was more than that. Maybe she wanted someone to just know. She always had to know about people. She spent so much time psychoanalyzing patients, saving self-righteous nin, helping her friends and her enemies alike. This was her path: She was supposed to give. And she had convinced herself a long time ago that it was incredibly selfish to desire so strongly the "get" part of that - even though now, as she "got" less and less, she was falling apart. Solitude was the only place she could do that in peace.

She had sensed him before he approached, meaning only really that he wasn't trying to conceal himself. Despite wanting alone time, she had not concealed her chakra, ducked out when she sensed him coming, or told him to go away when she felt him standing behind her. Staring out over the village, she longed for something indescribable. She wanted something she was fighting against wanting. She did not want to be herself. But then again, she never did.

However, despite noting his approach, the cool metal on her skin and his fingers tickling the back of her neck made her shiver in mixed surprise and nerves. Looking down, she was so befuddled - a necklace? It was beautiful, so gorgeous - but...

"A cherry blossom for the cherry blossom... in honor of the cherry blossom festival." He cleared his throat, realizing his words were not nearly as confident or smooth as he wanted. Moving quietly to her side, the quaint village so alive with colors and sounds, despite this building's silence. He could understand her desire to be away from it just a moment.

"It's... beautiful." She was staring at him while he stared at the town, confused just as much by her feelings about the necklace as to his intentions with giving it. She did not know what else to say.

"When I became Hokage," He pulled his mask down to let his cheeks soak in the cool air, a level of comradery between them she had never fully acknowledged and appreciated, "This village was still recovering, so many lost, so much lost... Sometimes I take peace for granted. As people regain their normalcy, their life... I feel... lost. A ninja, that was always my path. But... How can one even think such a selfish thing when nights like tonight unfold?"

"You have a lot of time with your thoughts during peace," She nodded to that, but couldn't agree with him. "You're so much more than a ninja though, you know that. You're a natural leader. A teacher. That is a Hokage's true purpose."

He gave her a kind smile, but she saw hollowness in the gesture. Yes, she had given that rosy grin too many times. It was meant to comfort the comforter.

"Don't give me that," She gave a soft laugh, though it was sad. But she didn't know what else to say, so she tucked her tumbling pink locks behind her ear and bumped him softly, "I mean you're an excellent jewelry connoisseur, for one."

He... blushed? "You like it?"

She turned shades redder than her hair. "Y-yeah, it's so pretty."

He laughed, pulling up his mask, perhaps to hide his glow. "I'm glad you think so, Sakura-chan."

Fireworks erupted down by the lake, exploding into colors that spelt out,

"Temari

Will you

Marry

Me?"

She smiled softly, hearing the whole town come alive with aws and cheers - if Shikamaru had planned on doing this intimately, Sakura had blown up his spot. But there was no bigger surprise than one that shined brighter than the stars. Any woman would want such a gesture. A soft sigh escaped.

"You did that?" He wasn't really asking, but laughed when she said "No, as far as I'm concerned, it was all Shikamaru. I just hope she said yes."

"You're always doing too much," He shook his head as if to scold her, "You're really something else."

If he didn't know, he was doing a good job at convincing her he did. It was like that cool breeze had been evaporated; Her skin hot under Suna sun with the way he looked at her. She didn't understand her desire to show her whole hand, or why she wanted to cry, or what any of it meant - and it all made her felt girlish and weak, and if she hated -anything- on this earth, it was being weak, and she just needed to, to...

"We should be heading back," She cleared her throat, regaining her composure, "My job's not done, after all. Smoozing with the important people from around the world isn't just the Hokage's job. The hospital always needs medical nin."

She was referring to the banquet they would be late to if they didn't hurry up. Kakashi felt like they had time, but she argued he was always late, and she simply wouldn't let a Hokage do such a thing.

He couldn't argue against that, and certainly wasn't going to sit here alone, though he wished she wasn't so eager to get back to the village center. It was all a little too much; Sensory overload, really. And the constant chit chatting - it was exhausting, to smile and nod and remember someone from ten years ago who knows exactly who you are.

Watching her at his side, seeing the way the necklace perfectly curled around her collar bones, it filled him with warmth. He only wished he could express that. Naruto's words had weighed heavily on him when he was left alone at the festival; All he had wanted was to see her, and he found his head swiveling, awaiting her return. When he saw Ino and no Sakura, he went to seek her out. When he tried to be normal, his words stumbled over themselves, and his stomach knotted at his fear she would be freaked out by his gesture. When she wanted to go back to the village he was sad. When he was next to her now, he felt pride that she was wearing something he gave her. He thought she was beautiful.

He thought he was stupid for thinking all of that, even if he could accept that's exactly what this was.

When they arrived, people were surrounding Temari, who's buns were draped in flower crowns and who's finger adorned a rock they could see from the edge of the room. Shikamaru looked like he was melting under the attention, but the smile on Temari's face kept him smirking ever so slightly.

"I've never seen Temari-chan so embarassed," Gaara mused to Naruto, "How excellent."

Naruto shot a knowing smirk to Sakura who blushed, but they wouldn't give up Shikamaru's secret. After all, all he had done was go to the experts. Rule number two of being a ninja: know when you're outmatched. Rule number one, of course, was never leave a teammate behind.

"The first course is being served!" A bell was rung, and people began scrambling to their assigned seats. She had put herself next to Naruto, but now that seat was occupied by Sasuke. "No worries!" Naruto had seen her dejection; Scrambling to go grab a chair and drag it... next to Kakashi. Kakashi's eyes twitched ever so slightly. "A table of team 7! Like the good old times!"

They sat and began eating their first meal in relative silence, until Naruto, mouth full of rice, exclaimed, "Hey Sakura! Nice necklace! Where'd you get it?!"

She blushed, looking to Kakashi for some help, unsure of why she couldn't bring herself to simply say it was from him? She wasn't ashamed of it, but...

"I bought it for Sakura," Kakashi had choked on his food, but caught himself quickly, wondering if Naruto really did have a death wish, "A fitting gift for someone who would put all of this together, no? She deserves some recognition from the village for putting on such a great festival."

The necklace was... Oh.

What had she thought the necklace could have meant?

 _Stupid girl_ , she scowled, _you only pain yourself. Why did you think this would be any different?_

Like he could ever see her as an equal. _Why did you even want it to mean something else anyway?_

An hour past. Kakashi had noted her silence, but any attempts from him to get her to talk seemingly went unnoticed, any from the others just as inefficient. Sasuke was staring her down, but she wouldn't make eye contact with him. What had he missed?

Silence left her learning a lot about her friends - mainly how much she had fallen out from them. Hinata had an obvious infatuation with Kiba, leaving her wondering when Hinata had abandoned her childhood admiration of Naruto. She supposed three years of no excuses or answers would leave her dejected too - or maybe, like Sakura, she knew Naruto well enough to understand it was simply never going to happen. Seeing through the french doors to the patio from her seat, she watched Anko invading Iruka's personal space to whisper something in his ear that made him shiver. Choji and Karui were conoodling in the corner - Ino was shamelessly dangling herself over Sai. Rock Lee would've been an excellent boyfriend - showing off TenTen to any one who crossed their paths, especially to Gaara who did not how to politely silence his friend.

She also noticed that she was the only one swimming in her lonely silence while surrounded by mutual happiness.

"Hey~ Space cadet!" Naruto waved his fork infront of her, "Sasuke-kun asked you a question."

She was not alone, no, but she surely felt it. He didn't force her to politely ask him to repeat himself. "Would you like to get lunch tomorrow? It is... shockingly... ramen." He shot the blond an eye roll, but he was too busy beaming. "It'd be nice to get the whole team together for once!" Naruto added, quickly changing her answer.

"I would love to," She was a rancid liar, "But... I have a girls night planned already, sorry."

Sasuke "hn"ed at the same time Kakashi "hmphed", and much like the balcony, air escaped her lungs and she sought relief on the patio alone.

Ino had put it bluntly a year ago when she was puking outside of a bar after sunrise, back when her friends still came to try and get her home - Sakura was fucked up. It wasn't until now that she could completely accept that, though the ones she chose to accept weren't necessarily the ones Ino had meant. Hot for teacher? Really Sakura? Could you get any lamer?

She had meant to be alone, but she was almost relieved to find Ino-pig enjoying a drink by herself out there. "We're getting lunch tomorrow, if anyone is smart enough to ask you."

A slender blonde brow peaked, "Where?"

"Not ramen," Sakura grumbled, resting her elbows on the rails and hanging her head.

"How about the new sushi place on the edge of town?" Sakura hadn't meant they were actually getting lunch tomorrow - but she suspected that Ino knew that, and was simply using Sakura's lie against her. After all, how could Sakura escape her forced hand? "Shall I invite Hinata?"

Sakura shrugged. It didn't matter - she was planning on being very hung over either way. She hadn't started drinking yet, but at this point, she was ready to be the Usain Bolt of shots. In fact, she grabbed Ino's melting drink and knocked it back in one swift chug, leaving Ino drinkless. "I didn't need that," Ino rolled her eyes, putting her elbows on the rail beside her friend.

"I haven't had sex in so long," Sakura was arguing out loud to herself, "I really need to have sex. Ino-pig, introduce me to someone."

"We're at a political banquet, not a dive bar," Ino rolled her eyes, but was met with the same look - Sakura knew that. Obviously. But she was desperate to rid herself of these thoughts.

"I'm sorry I haven't been around much," wondering if Ino's sugar-less delivery was out of animosity, "Apparently, you were right. I'm a little fucked up."

"Apparently," Ino smiled - supposed to follow it with a laugh, but it got stuck in her throat. "Sakura..."

She waved her off, "Let's not talk about me. You and Sai... finally happening huh?"

There was a long silence. "We've been dating six months."

Ah. Sakura shut her eyes. She deserved to be alone, look how she treated her best friend, being so selfish. "Well, I'm happy, I- uh, I'll see you tomorrow,"

Ino had went to grab her wrist, but Sakura pulled away, a small, sad smile on her lips. "Sushi right? I'll be there. Promise."

Ino had seen a glimmer this past week - a crack in the mud-crusted window that was letting the light out, showing her that her friend was still there - but tonight, it seemed as though the tenant had re-boarded her windows, shutting herself in and away. What had brought her out? What had pushed her back in? Was there a way she could help?

Kakashi's hands had trembled so badly at the table, he pulled a card from Sakura's notebook and ordered sake. To celebrate! Of course, yes, sure. To stop his racing heart, to relax his swollen throat, to stifle the incessant thoughts that kept telling him he had done something to make her look so ghostly when he had no idea what he had done wrong.

She had been so beautiful but moments before, so herself - but just as suddenly, she had vanished looking no better than she had a week ago. With her fleeing he felt vacant, and reminded himself that this is why he strayed from people for so long.

When Sasuke and Naruto both refused a second round, he ordered one for himself, sucking down the warm liquid until the burn stopped burning and his vision was blurring. Sasuke wanted to intervene, but the hostile air from early hadn't cleared, and he feared only agitating it by reprimanding a man who had once been his sensei. Naruto had abandoned them at the table sometime after Sakura left, and so they were stalemated. When Kakashi ordered another round, Sasuke indulged him - half a bottle better than a whole. Team 7's greatest weakness, and perhaps, greatest strength, was that no matter the situation, big or small, dire, frowned upon, or glanced over by others - they would always self-sacrifice for each other. Even at his worst Sasuke had come back to save Naruto from the Zero Tails. Even with blatant and confusing displeasure from the silver haired Hokage across from him, he would do what he could to save him from whatever had set him on this binge.

As Naruto would to save them both, sacrificing what time felt so precious for a man he never got to see, to try and salvage a situation they were royally fucking up. Funny how two of the people he thought were the smartest, greatest ninja, one of whom was literally responsible for a whole village, was too dumb to see the most obvious thing ever. Tch, and to think Sasuke always called him an idiot. Clearly he was a genius if those two couldn't see what was so apparent.

Sakura was at the bar doing a shot of something sweet, dreading her reality, when Naruto, tailed by Ino, came speed walking over to her. She hadn't gotten drunk enough in that window of time to deal with them, but when she went to leave the bar ahead of their arrival, Naruto called over, "The village needs you!"

Well, that atleast got her to turn around and raise a slender pink brow. He scratched the back of his head with a weak smile that said "maybe that's an exaggeration" but nonetheless, before she could change her mind, he pleaded, "Kakashi-sensei's one sake bottle away from making a total fool of himself, I think we should convince him to go before he does..."

She looked over at the table where Kakashi was slumped on one hand, sipping from the cup at alarming speeds. Sasuke seemed to be trying to take the bottle away, but he was being swatted at by a Kakashi who loudly proclaimed "Don't question your teacher!" and got many a glance his direction.

Oh, this was bad. And as she was part of team 7, she would sacrifice her self-preservation, the shutting of those feelings, and her desire to do the same exact thing, to save her teammate from himself.

"Let's convince him to go for a walk," Sakura responded quickly, trying to come up with a plan.

"He won't go," Ino sighed, "I mean, I can do this the easy way, but someone's gonna have to stay with my body."

"I'll stand watch," Naruto nodded, "Sakura, once you're far enough away and Ino transfers him out, will you do the pleasure of walking our hokage home, I'm sure Sasuke will come."

Naruto knew Sasuke wouldn't go. Sakura didn't, but she knew she didn't want him to. His night was already getting sidetracked as it was. Sasuke didn't know he was part of any plans until a seemingly sobering Kakashi looked up suddenly, and whispered, "It's Ino. We gotta go, now."

Sakura was there then, making small talk with Sasuke and "Kakashi" as they tried to make an Irish goodbye happen in a Japanese tea house. They escaped mainly with quick polite promises of being right back, but after heading to the patio, they quickly ducked over a gate and toward the town. "Damnit Kakashi," Kakashi, rather, Ino, muttered, "Know what's for your own good."

He was, no doubt, trying to shove her out of his head - Sakura familiar herself with the technique, knew it was less than pleasant, and had he been any less inebriated, it would've been easy for him to shove the blonde out. But as they left the main area of town, she began grinning, though commented nothing at all. "Adios," was all she said before Kakashi was back, much less sturdy and very disoriented.

In her own body, Naruto sitting next to her on a bench outside, she grinned at him, who already knew what she was going to say. "This has so got to happen."

"Sakura... Sasuke... I'm fine, I should, don't you- Ino should be in jai..."

Sakura shushed him, scooping one of his arm's over her shoulder, "She should win a medal for coming up with that plan," She corrected, "Sasuke, get going. I can take it from here."

"I'm a bit bigger," he offered, but she waved him off. She owed Kakashi, that much was sure, and she wanted Sasuke to go have his night. "Go. You have somewhere to be."

But Sasuke didn't get very far until Naruto caught up to him, informing him they had a secret mission.

"Sakura..." They were nearing his apartment, thankfully, as he seemed to be dozing off on her. She ignored him, knowing he wasn't going to be able to finish whatever he was trying to say, and she was busy ignoring his warmth and how comfortable he felt around her. "No, Sakura-"

He pulled away from her just in time to wretch up all his insides next to her shoes and not on them. A medical nin does not flinch at vomit, and so she held his hair and rubbed his shoulders while he threw up. "One time," she kept rubbing his back in circles, "Naruto got so drunk he went on such a long rant about Sasuke... We were with Hinata and... Shikamaru, right, yeah, and all of a sudden, Shikamaru goes "So why don't you go blow him then" and Naruto threw up in response - but like, all in Hinata's lap. To this day, I can't even imagine her depth of love for that boy, because white faced and all, she did nothing but politely excuse herself and go home without making a scene. We carried Naruto home that night, and he still almost threw up on Shikamaru after that."

Kakashi wretched again. "Another time, some hot shot from the Land hidden in the Mist was trying to smooth talk me, when I was way younger, and eventually I guess he got impatient, because he goes, 'I could transform into Uchiha if you want' and I round housed him through the wall. Needless to say, my team wasn't happy we were permanently kicked out of a bar letting minors in." She laughed at the memory. His hair was damp with sweat, but he had stopped vomiting.

"My point," She smiled, combing her fingers through his hair, "Everyone has those nights."

"Do you still like him?"

Her laughter cut, and she looked quizzically down at her former teacher. "Who?"

There was a long pause, "Sasuke."

"No," She chuckled, "That ship sailed moons ago. Though apparently you're not the only one who thought that was still a thing."

"Did he try... Cause I'll kill him if-" Kakashi couldn't finish a sentence, but he did pull himself to his feet, seemingly steady.

"No, trust me, no-" That had not been what she meant it to sound like, and she was caught off guard by his violent tone, the way his fists balled at his sides. "Come on, 'Kashi, let's get you home." He had shook his head, but she all but dragged him toward his apartment.

"No," He kept mumbling, and when they got to the door, he made no moves for his keys. "No, you can't come in," He muttered, when she reached for his keys, he grabbed her wrists. "Air."

She sighed. His face screamed desperation, and she was just as eager to dispel whatever troubled him. So they went, off toward the fields not far from his home. The second they entered the meadow, he sprawled on the ground, staring up at the stars.

"Why... have you been alone so long?" He was trying so hard to speak clearly, even with his mind a mess. "If not for...Sas'uke."

Leaning back on her palms, she wasn't sure what he was prodding at. "I don't know, Kakashi. I could ask you the same thing."

"I'm old," He shook his head, "But you're...you."

She didn't know how to take that, but thought maybe he just wanted to hear her talk about something, so he didn't have to do any thinking. Maybe he was lonely and wanted to understand someone else's loneliness. Maybe she knew telling him all this was a mistake, but she did it anyway, "I can't relate to too many people, and I pushed a lot of them away myself. I want to be with someone who can understand every side of me, but I have been fragmented far too many times to know if that's ever possible."

"You're not broken," He mumbled, trailing off as if he had more to say, but nonetheless silent. When she looked over, he was asleep. _You're not broken,_ his words echoed in her head. She couldn't say he didn't know – he, Naruto, Sasuke, they were the closest people to her. His words had weight, and right now, it pooled in her chest where her breathing became that much harder. _You're not broken._ She took a deep breath. _You're not._

What to do now? She couldn't leave him, so she guessed it would be time she returned his favor that had started this all off, and wait for him to wake up too. He was peaceful when he slept. He looked almost child-like, despite his scar. She could not escape him, even in accidental situations like this one.

"Are you fucking kidding me?!" Naruto angrily whispered, perched in a tree above the scene. Sasuke, rubbed his tired eyes. "Naruto, can we go home now that you're done spying?"

"No! I'm mad! Besides, we have to make sure no one finds them sleeping in a field together. That'd be a little scandalous."

Sasuke had not signed up for sleeping in a tree all night. He had done that for years and was finally home in Konoha, where he anticipated at least a couch to sleep on, if not a bed. He had anticipated some clumsy romantic evening, if not, atleast one where he could be close to Naruto, just the two of them, to gauge everything between them. It had been some time, and he missed the boy so much his bones ached for him. It took all his restraint not to 'accidentally' fall into his arms all evening.

"Why are we spying on them?"

Naruto was staring at him deadpanned, "Not you too. Am I crazy?! You're supposed to be a genius for crying out loud! How am I the only one who notices how into each other they are?!"

"Kakashi and... Sakura?" Sasuke's brows knit together. Had she been immune to him because she had moved on? But Kakashi was their... Well, he had been rather aggressive toward him all night, and he had walked into some playful banter between them... He supposed it made sense, but the option had never even occurred to him as a possibility before. They were adults, and intellectually, very similarly minded…

"I can't believe I get them alone, I work out this whole plan, and instead of confessing he throws up and goes to sleep?!"

All of a sudden, Naruto's dodgy behavior made sense – he had been trying to orchestrate something between the two. And his obsession made more sense because…

"Are you saying you're mad because two people obviously like each other and neither have made a move yet?"

"Yes! I-"

He had chased him all over the world. It was not like an Uchiha to run, and so he stopped. Naruto's whole body buzzed when warm lips enveloped his own, one hand finding his cheek, the other clutching to his waist, making sure the nin did not fall from the tree. Unlike the first two kisses the boys had shared, this one held no shock, no fear, no confusion in message. No, this kiss felt utterly right, like the culmination of their lives up until this point to have achieved nirvana, a true state of peace and comfort and love. If Sasuke had one wish, it would be to never leave this tree, to never lose the blond's warmth, to never ever, question whether he was loved.

When Sasuke pulled away, Naruto got a little misty eyed. "Sometimes, I wasn't sure if you... If we were just..."

Sasuke pulled him to his chest, holding him as close as he could, "Idiot."

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

Bet that wasn't the sweet lovin you thought you were getting ;) sorry, I'm a tease. Reviews make me very happy and create longer updates like this! Thank you for all the support so far!


	8. Chapter 8: An Older Suitor

Sunrise was spilling over the horizon when Kakashi awoke the next morning. Chilly, he gravitated to the warmth next to him without thought - arms tangling around the source - waking the moment he could comprehend what that warmth was.

He stiffened, keeping his eyes shut. He didn't remember much of the end of last night. Had he gone home with someone? No - he remembered… walking home, with Sakura -

That got his eyes to shoot open. A mess of pink hair skewed his view, but there was no mistaking the body now locked in his arms. Had they-?!

The breeze that had stirred him blew over him once more, diverting his gaze to the sky - no ceiling in sight. Ah, yes. He had gotten very drunk and Sakura had walked him home - in his belligerent state he couldn't bring himself to let her inside his apartment because he feared for his own self control, but he couldn't bare to be alone - so he had begged her to go for a walk. She had obliged him, but if she woke up right now he'd probably be lucky to land in the lake nearby after she kicked his balls up his throat.

The image made him shiver - and the pinkette stirred against him. Closing his eyes in anticipation (and thinking to himself it was totally unfair since he hadn't done this all intentionally) he waited, but found no pain enter his body. Rather her arm curled around his, pulling the stiff commander against her body. Craneing his neck he found what he suspected: she was sleeping, and guilty of the same involuntary motion as he. He thought he should pull away…

but a few minutes like this wouldn't hurt, right?

Kakashi wasn't much of a cuddler; Rather, his bedmates past usually didn't stay the night, or if they did, come morning, breakfast was more of a pleasantry than an invitation to hang around. He wasn't cold - well, some ladies may have said that, but he never tried to be. Kurenai had pestered him for years to settle down, and he had tried - but all that had come from it were these idle nights, and he couldn't bring himself to show any false affection and create false hopes. When he was younger, sex took place mainly in brothels and inns in random villages, and at that point, neither party was looking to hold hands all night.

But Sakura… was it her sweet scent? The soft curves of her body, the way it melted into him in a totally platonic way? Sex wasn't on the brain, and instead it left room for… feelings.

Kakashi wasn't a fan of those.

Feeling her stir again, he braced himself once more - but this time, she rolled over, pushing him onto his back and her arm over his chest, which threatened dangerously to beat open. He had survived wars, and a sleeping twenty year old girl was going to be the death of him.

Sunlight cracked over the horizon, but it wasn't uncomfortably bright yet. He imagined it couldn't be later than seven or eight, and no one would expect him at the office today - his only obligation lunch time with the boys. If Sakura would sleep until then, he would let her - because this feeling was more addictive than any drug. When he accepted she wasn't going to wake - a heavy sleeper made sense; she did get carried up a whole flight of stairs without stirring - he relaxed and took in how she felt against him. Every point of contact was on fire, his hand itched to reach around her and hold her waist to him. He did not want to let this go, even if he knew this was a lie.

Eventually sleep welcomed him once more - but only briefly, before his warmth evaporated and a panicked, "Oh god," escaped the lips of his not-lover.

He pretended to be asleep, to avoid their awkwardness, to save himself from being accused of knowing. This would be his secret alone. "Sakura get your head out of your ass…" She mumbled, sighing heavily, "Like this is going to make it suck less."

What suck less?

Unfortunately, she stopped mumbling to herself and meandered toward the lake, if her chakra signature was any indication. He waited a few minutes then feigned sleepily waking up - alarmed at where he was and why they were there. She explained in a polite way parts of the night, and he scratched his head with shrugged shoulders, "Sounds like a rough time."

She rolled her eyes, "Come on, if your back hurts as bad as mine, you probably should be getting home." _Oh, I could make your back hurt_.

He flushed beneath his mask. Okay, so maybe when he said cuddling was totally platonic he lied, a little. Maybe it had… additional effects beyond being very comfortable, and now, with her little gasp of surprise when she woke up, her messy hair, and her non-chalant words, he found himself doing anything but vanishing to keep himself from undressing her mentally.

"Yes, my back," Kakashi mumbled, grabbing her outstretched hand. They had to walk the same way toward their apartments, with Kakashi's being first. At his pathway, they both paused, platonic or not - this was their second time, loosely put, sleeping together, and things were bound to start getting weird between the two. But Sakura wanted to put her feelings aside for him, because yesterday he seemed genuinely distressed, and she wanted to help him, "You know I've got plenty of left overs," She offered as casually as she could, "And I know there's nothing you like more than free things. Come by some time."

"I'll drop in sometime," Kakashi didn't think he would take her up on it, but he appreciated the jesture. Suddenly the idea of being alone with her felt overwhelming.

"Just try to give me a heads up," She was talking as she back away, kind grin on her face, but eyes that didn't match.

He waved her off and went inside, unsure of what to do - with her, or with his throbbing errection. Good god, at 35 it hadn't really died off how he expected, and in reality, only having less sex with women was just paining him more than anything. A cold shower - or a hot one, with his hands - would just have to do.

She couldn't bring herself to go back to sleep lest she miss her friends, and she had promised Ino she absolutely wouldn't miss her lunch date, so she threw herself in a hot shower and tried to scrub out any dirt she may have gotten in her hair. Unfortunately, the warmth from the shower reminded her vividly of this morning, where she found herself tangled in Kakashi, clutching him like a stranded survivor to their lifeboat.

Not that she had never seen Kakashi partially nude - she was a doctor, after all - nor that she had never considered his physical appearance, but finding her fingers digging into his light kimono, feeling his flat, firm chest, the way his abdomen rippled like stone waves that crashed against the cuts of his V… well, that part, Sakura had imagined. Rather in detail, in the dream she was enjoying when she woke up.

Even now, she could feel the warmth between her legs, willing her arms to turn the shower to ice cold to stop her train of thoughts from derailing, but instead she found herself tracing all the parts of her that had held him that morning. Her knees shook at her teasing. No, she couldn't indulge. He wasn't just her -former- teacher, he was a friend, a colleague, and for Kami's sake, her Hokage.

 _But plenty of women have had sex with the Hokage..._ Inner Sakura was just egging her on, sparking a wildfire of jealousy and a flurry of terrible thoughts. _With that Sharingan, gone or not, he's probably mastered a whole slew of positions..._ A shiver down her spine, breath hitching in her throat. No, no, _no._

Forcing herself out of the shower, she hurried to get ready and showed up for sushi almost two hours early. Not only did she not like being alone with him, she apparently couldn't be alone with herself either.

"Well aren't you early," Ino was practically bouncing in her walk, Hinata timidly smiling at her side, "I expected you'd be late after lugging a grown man home."

"Couldn't sleep," Sakura shrugged, sipping her water. She hadn't wanted to hear it from Ino about drinking before dinner, but she had walked into Ino's accusing look with that one, and she flushed - the shower, this morning, Kakashi all came to the front of her mind. "Gross," Sakura rolled her eyes.

"You said you needed that dick," Ino shrugged, "I don't see anything wrong with it."

Regretting lunch more and more, Sakura shifted the conversation without compromise, "Hinata, how was your night?"

"Oh," She blushed, "It was great, Sakura-chan - the, the festival was beautiful."

Ino leaned across the table with a shit-eating grin, "Guess who got to second base last night with Princess Hyuuga over here?!"

"Ino! That was-"

"Private, yeah yeah, Sakura doesn't count," Ino waved her off, waiting for Sakura to oblige her baiting.

Kiba stopped at second base? Inner Sakura was surprised. There had been some scandalous night many nights ago where she had gotten to know Kiba…intimately, and the man was anything but gentle or slow paced. Of course, Hinata didn't need to know that.

"Secret's safe," Sakura smiled at Hinata, not indulging Ino, "You must really like Kiba."

That poor girl's pale skin betrayed her at every turn since they were children. "I guess I'm that obvious, huh."

"I think it's great," Sakura added, "Love is a wonderful thing!"

"So why aren't you in it?" Ino prodded, but was cut short by the waitress coming to ask for their order.

Cranky, Sasuke sulked in in silence, following Naruto and Kakashi into the sushi place. Atleast it wasn't ramen, he thought, but still, did they have to make lunch plans? Why hadn't he said dinner? Oh right, he hadn't expected staying up all night (even if that included a long time of fondling a particular blond he was in love with.)

His silence did not feel out of place by the way Naruto kept them hushed in the casualest of ways - they had been sat at a booth with tall backs, and Naruto insisted he needed silence to read the menu since he didn't know anything about anything that wasn't ramen. Kakashi was still half asleep.

"Anyway!" Kakashi knew the shrill voice of a petite blonde anywhere, "So why aren't you seeing someone, Sakura?"

Kakashi was pretty sure he was imagining it, so he pushed his nose down into the menu. Naruto began to chat Sasuke up about something.

"I don't know! It's not like I don't want it, okay?" Sakura was getting sick of answering this question, both to herself and others.

"Well what do you look for in a guy?" Soft spoken Hinata could be identified easily as well. What are the chances?

Sakura squirmed uncomfortaby in her seat. She really didn't want to have this conversation, even if she should've expected it of her friends obsessed with boys. She was proud of Ino for settling down, because she had garnered a reputation (Sai might actually be the only guy in the village to haven't have heard it) but she knew they would be good for each other. Hinata, the opposite of Ino, found it hard to get a guy who respected her strict upbringing… but she supposed in love, some minor allowances could be made.

"I'm looking for traits, not the answer to the universe," Ino poked at her with her chopsticks.

"I don't know," Sakura waved her off, trying to think without anything in mind. "I need someone intelligent, for one. If I can't hold a conversation with you, what's the point? Other than that… I mean I'm not picky…"

"So you're easy?" Ino was pushing all the buttons.

"He's gotta be tough, mentally and physically," Sakura added, defending herself, "Someone with experience." Ino raised a brow, "Like, life experience, you hoe." Sakura rolled her eyes, "But sure, that too."

Kakashi had feigned interest in Naruto and Sasuke's conversation, but when he lowered his mask to sip his tea, his pink cheeks gathered a pointed look from Sasuke, and he slumped a little lower in his seat. He had never heard Sakura talk like that - and never heard of her sexual encounters. Not that he assumed she was a virgin, but… He shook those thoughts off, because it was making him mad.

"How about someone from the school?" Hinata offered, "They've got to be pretty smart right?"

"Like Tohei?" Ino tossed out there, laughing at Sakura's face, "Come on, he's a nice guy."

"And someone will find him charming some day but…" She sighed, "I'm somewhat shallow. Sue me."

"Okay, so what's the physical requirement?" Ino wasn't letting her go, but then again, Sakura had more or less requested her match making skills."Tall dark and handsome?"

"I don't have too much preference on hair color I guess," Sakura shrugged, "But you know what I find attractive. Tohei isn't it. Besides, I like… some mystery, you know? What girl doesn't?"

"Trust me, there's no mystery with Sai. I say one thing sarcastic and the kid thinks I'm leaving him forever." A heavy sigh, followed by, "How about age?"

Sakura was rushing to concentrate chakra in her cheeks to stop the blushing before it became noticeable. "What, you think I can't even get someone my age?!" It was purely defensive. Kakashi sunk.

"I'm just saying, someone with life experience… You've had a lot more in twenty one years than most." Ino shrugged, pausing to thank the waitress for their delivered food, "Maybe someone older than you would do you well."

Sakura slumped, hungrily picking up her tuna roll from the tray to give her a minute to chew it over. She had thought that people would find her infatuation weird, and here her friend was advocating an older male. Maybe she should throw out her weird feelings and see what Ino thought? "Well, actually-"

"I've got it," Ino dropped both elbows on the table, "He's tall, smart, a little smart-ass-y which we both know you like Mrs. Uchiha," Sakura did not like that nickname, "And while I know he's a rather seasoned ninja, I hear through the vines that he's quite the lover."

Kakashi was ping ponging back and forth between conversations, but he couldn't keep up with his racing heart. Older? Sakura said she would date someone older? Who did Ino have in mind that was an extremely seasoned ninja who people in general would assume was good at sex? Kakashi did read a lot of Icha Icha in public, and-

"Genma!"

Sakura's face faultered, but she pulled it into a smile, "I don't..know.."

Ino waved her off, "No, he sounds great. Why don't you give it a shot? When was the last time you were on a date? I hear he's actually trying to settle down - you know how men are. Late bloomers and all." There was silence, "It's settled!"

 _Oh hell no it's not!_ Kakashi damn near stood up from the table, but at the last second, Naruto's waving hand brought him to reality, "Gosh, does no one listen to Sasuke-kun?"

"I've got to get going, real estate shopping and all," Sasuke muttered, unamused with his part in this whole game. Kakashi rose when he did, "I should go too."

Sakura thought she recognized the voices behind her, but when she peered over, no one was there, both having exited in a cloud of smoke. She really needed to go take a nap. "I'm not feeling well," She threw out there, finishing her plate.

"I'm gonna find him and set something up for tomorrow. Be ready at 7!"

Before Sakura could object, Ino was gone, only a flurry of cash she threw toward the table left in her wake. Hinata stood and bowed, "If you want help getting ready I'll come over!" And then she, like a civilized human being, walked her way out of the restaurant. Sakura opted for the graceless 'poof.'

What had she gotten herself into?

And at what length was Kakashi willing to go to get her out of it?


	9. Chapter 9: On The Edge Of Salvation

All your reviews make me so happy! As for this chapter... Someone tell Tsunade-sama it's all her fault for no doubt opening all these bars in Konoha! Someone take the sake away! Why? Enjoy finding out ;)

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"Yamato!" No honorifics needed, Kakashi had thrown the door open to the Hokage's building so fast, it caused a gust of wind to nearly knock Yamato from his seat at his desk. He scrambled to stand at attention for his Hokage, but Kakashi didn't seem interested, "What's the longest mission we need filled?"

"Well, sir, there's an escort mission to-"

"Perfect, assign it to Genma." Kakashi was trudging through the room, tossing off his robes and pulling his concealed flask from under the desk. He didn't flinch when Yamato followed him in the room - he didn't care about his reputation right now.

"But-"

Yamato would've thought Kakashi was using a genjutsu with the fire that was contained in his gaze, the same gaze that struck him with fear.

"But?" Kakashi challenged, putting away the now empty flask.

"Genma is on a mission-"

Kakashi smiled. "Ah, nevermind then-"

"-He'll be back tomorrow, but you know the mandatory rest period, it's..."

 _For fucks fucking sake._

"Sir, if it's something top secret, we could perhaps-" He could see Yamato scheming ways to delay Genma's return, perhaps he had been suggested as a conspirator or a traitor, or there was vital important he not be here - and Yamato would always act for Kakashi without question - which made Kakashi sink. It was wrong for him to abuse his power in such ways. "No, Yamato-kun, just.. forget it." How would he stop this?

What if she liked him? Kakashi sipped at his drink, wishing he had no feelings at all. This was not enough alcohol for him to get there. What if they hit it off? His brain was begging for his response. _Good for them, then._ He scowled at his own egging; _She deserves to be so much happier than she is._ But are you okay with that?

Kakashi placed his head in his palms. _No._ He acknowledge his feelings. He didn't think he could bring himself to act on it. But _Genma?_ "Hokage-sama, is there something I can d-"

His head jerked up, forgetting Yamato was watching him contort in pain. "You may have the rest of the day off. Thank you for your help this last week, Yamato-kun."

"Oh, thank you, Sir- I,-" He hesitated, then bowed deeply and squiried away before Kakashi could change his mind or some dire situation came across his desk. Kakashi needed to be alone, and maybe all this work would help drown out his desires. He would work for the next week and not think of anything but, and he was committed to that. He was the Hokage first and foremost. He should be acting like that.

"What was that for?!" Naruto had waved his hands fragrantly, getting in Ino's face, who clearly didn't appreciate his closeness, "You had her! She was going to admit it!"

"You clearly don't know women," Ino huffed, crossing her arms, "Kakashi's gonna save her because he'll never let her sleep with his friend like that. Had I thought she'd entertain me with Gai, he would've been even better. Guys are jealous pyschopaths and girls are suckers for being caught after a chase."

 _No, girls are fucking delusional, clearly!_ Naruto's jaw was hanging, "You're assuming Kakashi-sensei will even show up!"

"You don't think he will?" Ino quipped. Hinata and Sasuke both stood behind the screaming nin, though the former quivered more so than the raven.

Naruto sighed. "You're probably right..."

"So what's the problem? She goes on a date gets treated to a dinner, Kakashi makes a scene and Sakura can't help but say yes. He should be admitting to this with some balls, not because you set him up to overhear her admitting her feelings. Listen to me, and maybe even you can get a girlfriend."

Sasuke let out a laugh. A few eyes shot his way, he glared until they regreted the decision.

"I want in," Kiba yawned as he strolled up, Shikamaru and Choji at his side. _Great,_ Naruto growled. "I owe her a horribly embarrassing admission," Shikamaru added, "Or I wouldn't even bother. Meddling is so troublesome."

"I think this could all be avoided by letting things take their course," Sasuke offered, but got varying degrees of glares from the rest of the party.

"Listen, Naruto," Ino ignored them all and set out to finish their argument, "I love that girl to death. I'm not gonna do anything that jeopardizes her happiness."

Sweats, hair tied up, in a loose tank, she had really gone home with the intention of taking a nap, but when she woke up around seven pm - starving and too full of nerves to eat, the bottles strewn around her room called to her.

So she tied up her hair and set out to clean them. She did not need them! When had she cleaned last? Lifting the sake bottle off her dresser, it took a tug and a distinctive 'plunk' to remove it from the stickiness and dust. She threw them all out, pilled the plates, made her bed - picked up the cups from her side table, saw the pictures covering with dust. Team 7 - her family, and really, her truest friends. Ino, too. The lovelorned look she gave Sasuke back when she believed in love. She missed it - even the pain. The pain was at least a reminder she was alive.

One photo caught her eye. Although recent, it lingered near the bottom. Maybe she had put it away for a reason. Her promotion to the head of the hospital at age twenty - a picture from the ceremony they held for her honor. Everyone was there, all the ninja of the village, Naruto, Tsunade, and Kakashi all on stage with her. This photo wasn't of her with them - no, it was of her smiling. Beaming with pride. When she thought back over the years after the war, she never recalled happy moments like this. But she knew her own smile from the fake ones, and this was real. Was she actually happy?

In the background of the photo, something else caught her eyes. Kakashi wasn't looking at the camera like the others, he wasn't clapping, he was just staring at her. She could see the faint outline of a grin behind his mask. He looked... happy, too. She realized she didn't see that from him all that often. How long had he been hurting for? Not as long as she, right?

Longer?

Back to him. Cleaning! A picture of her greatest accomplishments, and somehow, she was analyzing a background detail!

And so even though her empty bottles were no longer in plain sight, they called to her from their garbage grave yard; and that's how she ended up here – at a bar, in sweats, hair tied up, in a loose tank, shamelessly knocking back drinks. She had really gone home with the intention of going right to bed, but she couldn't sleep with a restless mind, and this would put that to bed first. Maybe then her heart too, would slow. To a stop.

 _Genma?_ Sakura sighed. _You could've made up an excuse to not go._ She shrugged. _You still could._

What was the point? She needed to put her feelings behind her. This was stupid. What had she done to get over Sasuke? Gotten drunk and fucked a few guys until she felt numb. Genma would be number one on the worst case scenario, maybe they'd find something in common at the best. Somehow she was still some stupid little girl playing grown up instead of actually being one. She couldn't compartmentalize the way she needed to. Not with her depression, not with her obsession, not with anything at all ever.

In her haze, she felt the fringes of cool energy nearer than she should've sensed it, but it hovered there for a long time. She knew that chakra anywhere. Had memorized its vibration one morning not so long ago. But it didn't come closer for what felt like hours, so she imagined she was making it up. Another game her sickened mind was playing on her.

So when it got closer, she paid it no mind. Not even when it was right next to her, or when a glass was placed beside her. She didn't look up from her drink. She didn't want to.

She knew she wasn't imagining it. No, it was a game the sick world was playing on her instead.

Kakashi didn't want to go in. He knew she was in there. He knew maybe he would see her, but of all the bars in all of the town... Maybe he had subconsciously tracked her down. He wanted to be close to her. Her chakra had a gravitational pull he just couldn't escape. Even lingering outside the dim watering hole, he knew he should go home, but he couldn't bring his feet to move. No, the best he could do was stand there for nearly an hour. When he finally picked up his feet, it was to enter.

So he sat at the bar next to her, though she made no friendly gesture. She looked like hell - drunk, sure, but not even trying to be presentable. She was in her pajamas, head down, hair falling from her pony tail in both the back and the front.

His fingers rapped against the glass in front of him. The silence was causing knots to form in his gut. Picked the cup up, tossed it back. _Clank._ Two fingers up for another. Repeat. _Repeat. Repeat._ His cheeks tingled.

When she raised her eyes, she looked like she was prepared to wince. Her drink was melted, she called for another. She dared look at him, immediately regretted it, making instant eye contact. Her cheeks boiled. He laughed.

"What..'re you l-laughing at," She growled, snatching the fresh drink off the bar.

"Your cheeks."

She didn't answer. Head hung again, she sipped her drink in silence. _Idiot,_ he scowled at himself. "I don't think I've ever seen you in sweats."

If he thought she couldn't get any closer to the bar without putting her face upon it, he was wrong. Her shoulders collapsed, like she was trying to hide in herself. "Not many people do."

 _But people do,_ he added to himself, his eye twitching at the thought. Was this what she looked like in the morning? After? When...

"..Pretty."

"What?"

He hesitated.

"I just.. I meant you still look.." He couldn't say the word again.

Her body was on fire, more than any alcohol could cause. She was drunk on his chakra. He had called her pretty. Well, he hadn't. She couldn't infer. But she wanted to.

"Two shots!" She put her first down on the bar. To hell! _You're already in it._

"Sakura..." Kakashi was drunk. It was late. And her emerald eyes were so magical he didn't even finish his protest. In fact, he had missed just when his hands had picked up the shot glass, willed it to cheers her. It was like he was watching a movie - the way her throat contracted when she swallowed making his whole body tense with terrible thoughts.

His gaze had her pinned. "Don't say my name like it pains you," She bit, but when she went to reach for her glass blindly, their fingers grazed as she clumsily reached too far. She jumped, swayed, end up putting herself closer to the nin.

In his personal space, her words echoed, his mind raced. He wanted to take her right here on the bar. To put her cute full cheeks between his two hands and hold her there while his tongue memorized every corner of her mouth. Sharingan or not, he would study her until she had no hidden places left. He wanted to enter all her most secretive spaces.

"Like it...pains me?" He breathed, remembering he had to answer her. Against his tight slacks was a quickly unbearable problem, one that did pain him. "I'll... say your name however I like."

A shutter ripped through her body. There was electricity buzzing so loudly between them, she could've swore the people across the street asleep in their beds might just feel it. How did she look at his jaw line without sexual thoughts on her mind usually? Because right now, it was looking like the sturdiest place to sit, and she was feeling pretty unstable.

But it wasn't only his heat she felt. Glancing left, she saw the bartender eyeing them over. Her cheeks burned for a different reason. They were not alone. They were drunk and making asses of themselves and she was reading the situation all wrong and she was getting caught up in a fantasy that wasn't real and they needed to get out of here no she needed to get out of here and go home, they needed to go _home_ -

She pulled away, clearing her throat and tossing some coins on the counter. "Goodnight," she called to the keep who was looking her over questioningly. She glanced at a puzzled Kakashi, eyes roaming over him one more time before she turned away and headed for the door.

Escape, escape, escape. She had gone here to escape. And she found herself caught in a trap. How could she escape him when he was at every turn. Leave the village? Jesus, she sounded more like Sasuke then she did anyone else.

"It's rude not to say goodbye," She had been looking down, and she ran right into him. Again. Her face was in his chest, his chakra was all around her, and she knew if she pulled away she'd do something she would regret.

But would she regret sobbing all over his shirt any less? Because that's what she started doing. Heinous, ugly, gut wrenching sobs that ran through her like a freight train. He had pushed his luck, and he made her cry. What did he even think he was gonna get out of it? He was pushing his stupid agenda on his drunk former student, and that made him the worst kind of person. All he could do to make up for that was to hold her while she cried.

He poofed her back to her apartment, to her bedroom, which he noticed she had cleaned up. She sobbed against him until she realized the change in scenery. Like all the wind was knocked out of her, she stopped with one gasp, pulling from him and turning away.

"Please, go home, Kakashi."

She was still sniffling, but her tone had entirely changed. His heart sank. "Sakura, it's okay, I'm here to-"

She shrugged off his hand on her shoulder. "Don't make me ask again..please." Her voice cracked. His heart broke. Why couldn't she ask him to stay. She had asked him to stay not that long ago. He needed to stay with her. Just a little longer, maybe he would work up the nerve to tell her. Had he mistaken the look she gave him? Had he- She would date someone older, why couldn't it be him? Why couldn't it be-

"Get out of my house!" She yelled, her eyes widening in shock at her own outburst. She opened her mouth to take it back, but he was gone. She had been yelling at herself, arguing with the part of her which wanted to beg him not to leave her. Things were okay when he was around, even if they hurt ten times more when he was gone.

And that's what she had driven him to do. The sobs started again. He could hear her all the way from outside, where he slumped against her apartment wall. His chest felt like it was collapsing. She had yelled at him. Sakura had _never_ yelled at him. She asked him to go. He had overstepped his boundaries. He had fucked it all up, like he knew he would, and they probably couldn't even be friends now.

Peace was not peaceful for two souls trapped in wars within themselves. Head over heart. Heart over head. Both sides were losing. Both sides teetered on claiming catastrophic casualties. His heart was bleeding out. Her thoughts were no longer swimming, they were drowning in her mind. The world inverted.

Souls, Lost on the edge of salvation. Afraid of the free fall.

Heartbreak was a hell of a horror.


	10. Chapter 10: Dealing With The Fall Out

Headcanon: Sasuke low key loves setting people up more than anyone else.

Headcanon two: Ino is incredibly jealous of all of her conquests with anyone. Ever. Even if she's taken.

Your reviews are stellar! Gonna try and update midweek if I get a bunch so that you guys don't have to wait too long, although theres a twist or turn left still ;)

====xx=====

"Sakura-chan," Hinata smiled, "You look so beautiful."

She spun the pinkette around in her chair to face the mirror, and Sakura could not disagree. Especially with the mess Hina-chan had found her in this morning, the girl was undervalued in her beautician skills. It was funny, because she never would've pegged her the type. "Where'd you learn to do this?"

"I have a little sister," Hinata blushed, "Plus, we were supposed to be trained in all the arts... According to my mother, beauty is one of them. I just... don't think I'm pretty enough for all that. I look silly."

Sakura frowned. "You're beautiful how you are, but I'm sure if you do even half a good as job on yourself as you do me, you're drop dead gorgeous." Hinata blushed, bowing at her compliments, but nonetheless hoping to lose the attention.

She had tucked Sakura's hair behind her ears, tying a red ribbon into a bow just before the crown of her forehead. Red lips, rosy cheeks; light pink dusted over her eye lids. A white strapless sundress, tan sandals, and a loose pink chiffon shall to make her presentable for dinner; All together, Sakura did feel pretty. And the foundation was applied liberally enough to cover the bags under her eyes.

The process had taken almost two hours, but Sakura didn't mind that as much as being woken up by Ino and Hinata arriving at one pm - too early for a girl who had sobbed herself to sleep sometime near daybreak. Ino was really just there to barge in because Hinata was too polite - as Ino said she had 'too many errands' to hang around. It was nicer that way. Sakura's head hurt too much to listen to Ino, but Hinata talked just enough - and soft enough - to keep Sakura out of her thoughts without making her headache pound.

She had learned more about Hinata and Kiba - they were, very obviously, not public, and she worried not official, but she was falling for him quickly and hated herself for it. They had been friends for years! When had these feelings popped up? "Longer than I want to admit," Hinata blushed - the feeling resonating with Sakura.

But as far as Sakura could tell, Kiba was trying to do right by her. Taking her to nice dinners, walking Akamaru together, going on hikes. It was she who feared her family might never accept him.

Sakura felt for the girl who clearly bore so many pressures on her. Although it was in jest - Ino had made a point that Hinata had never entered in the debaucherous behaviors all of her peers had grown into. Three years ago her 'late blooming' was considered normal, because the generation of teens had been trapped in war, unless they bloomed early - but even then, in the months following the saving of the war, all of them transformed into rabbits. She, Holy Hyuuga blood, fearing a higher power in her family, resigned herself to innocence. Now, many people were in relationships, and she was left on the outside. They were young! But life wasn't very long for ninja. She could see it all over her face: She just wanted her own family. Hinata was the girl who'd leave the party first to get married and have children, and she wasn't even invited to the event to have her chance. Maybe that was changing. Sakura hoped.

"Well, I'll leave you with my lipstick, if you need anything come find me!" Hinata was in a rush to go, but could Sakura blame her? They'd been at this for hours. Sakura wished the date wasn't another hour plus away, because as pretty as she looked, she was ready to go back to bed, not do this.

 _But I have to._ Last night was her ultimate confirmation. She would kill these feelings. She would fuck his friend and call it square. In the mirror, she shimmied her dress down as low as she could without her bra popping out. Yes, Sakura the She-Devil would be out tonight. She had to.

"No can do," Genma was waving Ino off. "I'm too old to play those games."

"Genma, this is like your best friend we're talking about here," Ino was hustling to keep up with the ninja trying to ditch her.

"And he's a former ANBU member, a fantastic Jonin, and oh, right, Our HOKAGE, so some twenty year old girl isn't a challenge for him. He'll get what he wants if he wants it."

"This isn't some twenty year old girl," Ino galloped in front of him, stopping him in his tracks, "Listen, I wouldn'tve believed it if I hadn't felt his passion for her. Like in his head, reading his thoughts, knew how crazy in love with her he is. This is serious."

Genma raised his brows, looking at her with disbelief and annoyance. She added, with both hands on her hips, "Besides, if I remember correctly, some seventeen year old ninja was a heafty challenge for you, only a few years ago."

His face fell. "We said we were never going to talk about that. We were in a war."

"I'm just saying, I'm finding myself morally opposed to keeping secrets suddenly," She shrugged, "Unless, of course, a secret for me is -"

"I'll take her on a date. If Kakashi doesn't show up she's fair game."

"Oh, he'll show up." Ino rolled her eyes, "Be ready with some flowers. You've got a reservation at Midori Sora's."

Genma growled, Ino smiled. "Do I get anything out of this deal if I don't get Sakura?"

 _Pervert._ Ino snorted, "I'm taken, but don't flatter me."

"Oh, I'm not flattering you. You being taken never stopped you before." He moved closer to her. A vein appeared on her forehead, "Insulting me's a good way to make sure it won't _ever_ happen!"

"Whatever you say, I've got a date with a prettier girl tonight anyway," He held out for a moment, " _Ino-pig._ "

She was seeing red, and he was gone. _What an ASSHOLE,_ she huffed. _Why do dicks have to be so attractive?!_

He did clean up nice, Sakura admited, when he knocked on her door around 5. In his hands were a big bouqet of tiger lilies - her favorite, though she sensed Ino had told him that. A three-quarter sleeve black sweater, hugging tight to his frame, loose black slacks, and his hair combed back. He eyed her over, "Why, don't you look absolutely amazing."

She blushed, "Thank you, Genma-kun. The same goes for you."

"Shall we?" He offered her his arm and the flowers, and she was obliged to take both. The smell of pine and perfume wafted up to her, something rugged and manly but still almost too much for her - he was trying too hard. Did most girls go for this? She was a ninja. They could've sparred and ate sandwiches and she would've felt more at home.

Still, she had never even seen the inside of Midori Sora's, the upscale joint located off the main road in town. The floor was solid jade, gold trim on the walls. Even dolled up, she felt out of place, but in awe. "Genma-kun, this is much too nice-"

"Nonsense," He smiled at her, "Not when I'm trying to woo the head of the hospital, the neo-Sanin, and one hell of a hitter."

She giggled, "More than a handful of men have underestimated atleast the last part."

"I'm hoping I never have to," He grinned, "So, tell me about yourself. What have you been up to? What do you do in your off time?"

The questions streamed like that for awhile. He made her do a lot of talking, but had fun tidbits to throw in about his own adventures on missions. She admitted she missed field work, he told her to be thankful for in a few years it'd all be old anyway. Besides, the exciting stuff was over, he said. True enough.

"Where is he?" Naruto grumbled, "He should be here already. He heard. Even if he was waiting until dinner to check on all the spots, they're already done with their appetizers! It shouldn't take him this long..."

"He'll be here," Ino said, but with wavering confidence. _Genma isn't gonna actually score with Sakura is he?_ She bit her lip. _No, he's not allowed to._

"Kiba, what's your status," Shikamaru yawned, sitting at a table disguised as an older gentleman, watching the date unfold. It was honestly going pretty well as far as he could tell.

"In the vent overhead, ready to drop the rose petals when Hokage-sama shows up." As he muted his mic, he looked devilishly at Hinata, who was sharing the very confined space with him. His hand moved to her waist, and she blushed. "Not here, Kiba-"

"We've got some time to kill until he shows up," Kiba gave her puppy dog eyes, "I just want to kiss you. May I?"

Things started heating up, and not because they were in an air vent.

On the ground level, Naruto was getting antsy, and no gentle, discreet touches from Sasuke could possibly get him to calm down. He had clearly invested himself here - and Sasuke could understand why. He loved Sakura too; She was their best friend. She was willing to do anything for them, and she deserved the insane treatment Naruto was giving her trying to make her happy. Did Sasuke think he was going about it painfully wrong? Sure. Would he back the blond on a suicide mission? Also yes. So he sure as hell would back him on this.

Still, his doubts about Kakashi coming were mounting.

And that got him to thinking. Kakashi and Sasuke had always gotten along because they had been somewhat alike, and if Sasuke thought Naruto would be happy with someone else...

His chest panged, and he subconciously grabbed the blond tighter, before coming to a realization at the finish of his thought. _If I thought Naruto would be happy with someone else, I would suffer to see his smile at no matter what cost._

A shadow clone was dispersed. _Kakashi, you idiot._

"Hokage-sama," Yamato peeped his head in the door, "Do you want some lunch? I think it'd be good for you to-"

This was about the nineth time Yamato had bothered him since he arrived this morning, and Kakashi didn't even both to give him a response this time, just a look that said "Shut the door". Kakashi didn't feel hungry. He didn't even feel hung over. He felt nothing. It made paper work easy - he didn't feel bored. He just signed and signed and read and shuffled, and he had been here since sunrise. No, he hadn't slept. But he did not feel tired.

"Sir-" Kakashi was about to throw a kunai at Yamato, and he could obviously tell, because he added quickly, "Former Hokage Tsunade is here-"

Kakashi relaxed back. Tsunade hated this office, what could bring her here?

"I hate this place," She scowled when she entered the room, and he chuckled. _Called it._

"What do I owe the honor?"

"A certain former student of yours," She grumbled, "And not even one of the ones I like."

"Sasuke moving back troubles you?" Kakashi had felt his anger at the boy subside when his hatred was redirected at Genma. Clearly he had misread that situation if no one was pushing her to go for him. Right? _Damn it._ Maybe he was skeptical.

"Not in the least," Tsunade sighed, "Naruto is too bright a light for him to want to come back if he still had any darkness. Are they a thing yet?" Kashi pailed. What? She ambled around the room, "It's dark, you know. You shouldn't be working so late. Poor Yamato has been patiently waiting to close up."

A glance out the window - hadn't he just asked about lunch? Ah, yes, it was past nightfall. He supposed he should at the least dismiss Yamato... but his stack of papers that never seemed to end... now seemed impossibly small. Had he done all this work today?

"When I was a girl," Tsunade didn't ask to sit, just reclined on one of the couches in the room, "Jiraiya was infatuated with me, and I obviously didn't reciprocate at the time. It was never the right time, you know? When we were kids he was immature and annoying. A complete pain in the ass, knuckle head. More like Naruto than anything," She laughed a little at the thought, "When we were adults I loved Dan. After that I was jaded. And then, when I wasn't, the world was. And he died because of it." She looked at her hands. "I'm not saying we would've... Or that I don't love Dan, I just..." She pursed her lips. _Damn it, Sasuke. Causing problems, even when you're trying to do the right thing._ "Excuse me. Let me get to my point. All of those things blocked me. I was always so concerned with what was right, I drank alot to cope with that." She frowned, "Maybe that got worse after becoming a Hokage, though I didn't have as much time. War drowns out your thoughts just as well as liquor."

When was the last time he had spoken to Tsunade? He felt violated. She saw him in his entirety, even if it was because she related - and... Sasuke? Had sent her? Had he seen through him so easily too? What happened to being a renounced ninja? He couldn't even keep his feelings-

"Love and war aren't that different, Kakashi. In both, our biggest regrets are the actions we don't take. In both, fear is the greatest enemy. In both, we wrestle with putting ourselves on the line for something greater. I didn't act. I regret it."

Did she know about...

"Now, you are a ninja I have great respect for. Jiraiya was your idol, but he admired so much about you. I see some of him in you, and... If there is one thing Jiraiya wasn't, it was a coward. Your team is full of brilliant, once in a life time ninja. There really may never be greater ninja than them. Even Sasuke. Their leader inspired that. Don't show them any other side of you."

"I'm not their teacher anymore," The thought of that connection made him feel shameful. His feelings for her were wrong, even if she was...maybe, trying to tell him that he should do it anyway.

"Kakashi-kun," Tsunade had stood, heading toward the door. "Sakura-chan is too smart of a woman to allow herself to be lead somewhere she doesn't want. But she will never take charge for you. Sometimes the strongest women... Just want to know someone will fight for them."

His mouth dried. She knew. Had Naruto told everyone? But-

She was saying Sakura wouldn't have let him get this far if she didn't want it.

"And so help me Kami, trust me I hit harder than she does so don't be stupid, okay? That girl is too good for all her pain."

She sighed when she left him. Yamato stood beside Sasuke, who eyed her carefully. "Uchiha, I'll be sure to serendipitously have you assigned to janitor duty for the next week for dragging me into this. I need a drink."

Sasuke bowed, "Thank you, Tsunade-sama." _A sign of respect?_ She chuckled. That boy was rich.

"I did it for Sakura. She's far too like me, and she deserves so much better."

Tsunade left, Sasuke lingered. When Yamato had told him the Hokage had strictly forbidden anyone from entering, Sasuke knew it was low to go to Tsunade - especially with her less than tender affections for the boy, but once he mentioned Sakura, she was willing to bound her way through the doors if necessary. Tsunade knew if there was one thing Sasuke wasn't, it was incorrect when he had the time to draw conclusions. Yes, he was brash and arrogant and rushed into battle when he thought he had the upper hand - how was Naruto much different? - but this was him being outmatched, and he had time to think that through.

Frankly, she wasn't surprised. Sakura was so strong, but her insecurities consumed her. Kakashi was confident and bold, if not awkward and reminsicent of Naruto when caught off gaurd. He wasn't nearly as brooding as Uchiha, but he did have the same cocky air. As for age, Tsunade looked no past forty now pushing her sixties. What did age matter?

"Sasuke." The raven jumped, but tried to return his composure when he turned to face his Hokage. "What restaurant are they at?"

His voice was calm, his eyes were wild. "Midori Sora's," Sasuke answered, holding an arm out to catch Kakashi as he went to stride past. A grin graced his lips, "You may want this."

He held out a button down and slacks. Kakashi raised a brow. "You should know that if I lower myself to meddling in others love affairs," Sasuke didn't bat an eyelash, "I'm gonna do it right."

He was gonna do it. He was gonna go get the girl.


	11. Chapter 11: No Soul Is Truly Lost

I tried writing this chapter several times, and I am still struggling to see if it passes my own test of conveying the important themes and beauty of the moments depicted here. I hope you'll indulge my headcanons and find it sufficient. I have so much love for this pairing/OT4 and I hope that this story has conveyed that to you.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-

"No way," She laughed, "Stop it."

"I'm serious!" Genma laughed, "Gai is only that brown because he's out training in the sun all day. When we pants'ed him, his ass was as white as milk."

Shikamaru twitched. Wasn't Sakura supposed to be like, awkward and hating this all? _It seems like she really likes him... Troublesome._

Ino was fuming so bad, she didn't even notice Sai approach from behind. "Why are we watching Sakura-chan?" She jumped, nearly hit him, then huffed at his intrusion. "It's over your head, Sai. Don't you have a class to teach?"

There was a long silence. "It's almost eight pm." She shrugged, whatever if he was right. "I haven't seen you in the last few days."

She frowned. That was true, running around for the festival, setting Sakura up - she had spent very little time with the boy she decided to not incorporate here. When she turned to apologize, he was holding a box of chocolates. Hand over her heart, she beamed. Right, this was the boy she cared for. Who tried, immensely hard, despite his absolute awkwardness. She looked back at Sakura who was laughing and leaning in at Genma - If Kakashi wasn't gonna come, then he didn't deserve her. "Let's get out of here," Sakura would be fine.

"I'm gonna go to the bathroom, but what do you say we get out of here after? We could grab a drink somewhere if you'd like." Genma slid from the table with a grin. Sakura smiled. Yes, this was a familiar game. "Of course!" She giggled. Her heart began to hurt from trying so hard.

Naruto was panicking. This was a mistake! A huge mistake! This wasn't how it was supposed to go, and it was all Ino's fault, and why hadn't Kakashi come-

He had to do... _something!_ "Sasuke, I'm going in."

"What? Naruto, no-" Sasuke tried to grab the blonde, but he was already crossing the restaurant. _Fuck. Kakashi, hurry up._

"Sakura, we gotta go," He pulled her up, but she resisted at the table, confused as to where on earth Naruto had even come from. "No I'm not kidding, we have to go."

"No? I'm on a date. Where did you even come from? You can't afford to eat here.."

"Sakura! This is all wrong and not how this was supposed to go and-"

While they swabbled, Genma pulled up his ziper and adjusted himself comfortably. When he looked up in the mirror above the urinal, his eyes met charcoal black orbs. "Ah."

"As your friend, I'm gonna have to respectfully ask you to go."

Leaning back against the wall, Genma grinned, "Took you long enough. Go get 'em, tiger." With a poof, he was gone. _And I really thought I was gonna get some. But hey, good for them._

"Naruto, leave her alone," Sasuke gave up his position, going up to Naruto to take him away. "Sorry, Sakura. We were having dinner and Naruto saw you-"

"Sasuke I'm not gonna let her end up with the wrong guy!"

"There are things you don't understand," Sasuke growled, tugging the blond, leaving Sakura completely bewildered, "Stop being an idiot and just leave her alone!"

"An idiot huh?" Naruto let go of Sakura to glare at Sasuke, "Sorry I have an emotional range deeper than a kiddie pool!"

Sasuke had went to answer, but the words were stolen from his mouth. Silence. "Well, that lasted long." Then the hawk that he was, he took off, and Naruto couldn't get his apology out fast enough. "Fuck!" Naruto growled, and now everyone was looking at the two of them. An old woman (Shikamaru) stood from her table. "Oh my! This food was terrible! I have to go home - right. now!"

Sakura was red in the face. Totally embarassed and furious, She was doing everything in her power not to hit Naruto, but her knuckles were turning white.

"Sakura."

All eyes went to Kakashi, and his confidence waivered. Maskless, in suit and tie, looking absolutely stunning. She was confused. "Oh." Naruto whispered. "I... have to go..."

As he turned, a low whine, creak, and subsequent booming crash all went off, as rose petals and a disheveled looking Hinata and Kiba fell from the air vent, looking rather cozy one hand up her shirt. All eyes left Kakashi, and went to the Hyuuga princess and her vent partner. Kiba gave a weak smile, but his face was rosey."Surprise?" Hinata was crying. Sakura rushed to help her. Kakashi wanted to throw up. Maybe this wasn't meant to happen.

Sakura effectively put the unassuming town people in a genjutsu to give Naruto time to help them up and away, although there was no completely erasing this memory from their minds. _What the hell is going on right now,_ Sakura was freaking out herself. When Kakashi put a hand on her shoulder, she shuttered. Why was he here. Why did he look like that. She was so embarassed after last night. And she had to apologize to him. And-

"Sakura! You have to help me get Sasuke back!" Naruto literally pulled her from Kakashi's touch. _This was not how he should confess._ "Come on, let's-"

"Naruto-"

"Kakashi-sensei," Naruto grabbed him, "Can you help too? I love him." _Tsunade was...right._

Sakura wanted the escape, and Naruto was willing to grant it. Kakashi's blood boiled. He was going to lose his nerve. He wanted to kiss her. He wanted to tell her-

"We'll help, of course," Sakura couldn't breathe. What was happening.

"Can you go find him. I'm gonna set something up in the Valley of the End, okay? Just make sure that you find him." Naruto knew that Sasuke would take awhile to fetch. Still, did he really want them together? "Sakura, can you go get Ino to help me set up and then go after Sasuke?"

Sakura was thankful for anything that put distance between her and Kakashi. Her shame was strangling her. "On it!" She was gone before Kakashi could stop her.

"Ino!" Shikamaru hadn't gone as far as he suggested, and had tracked her chakra before Sakura could start. "Get to the valley of the end. Surpress your chakra. " Ino, who had been lip locked with her porcelain lover, looked over at Shikamaru with irritation. "Let's try this for the ninth time."

"Yeah, without your brilliant plans."

Kiba and Hinata... had ducked far away, from what Shikamaru could tell. He'd be lucky to see Hinata in the next month with the way that girl handled embarassment. Who else could he possibly recruit? "I'm... gonna knock down the whole village if this doesn't go right." Tsunade-sama's slurred speech behind him were meant to perrsaued Ino, but they gave him an idea. It takes a village to raise a child, right? And if this relationship wasn't a love child of a whole generation worth of fucked up ninja, he didn't know what would be.

Sakura thought she had sensed Ino, but when she got to the field, there was nothing and no tracks. What on earth? Alone, surrounded by silence, she sunk to her knees, if only for a moment. What was going on? Why did Kakashi look like that? Poor Hinata- Naruto was so stupid, and... _Why did Kakashi look like that?_

She began to tear up as everything became overwhelming. Nothing made sense, and had Genma left? Or had she left him? Her plan had fallen through, at every turn, and she was so sick of fighting it. What would make it better? What would rid her of this? She wanted a drink. She needed release. No, she wanted to go to sleep, and very possibly never wake up again.

She got flash backs to her adolescence, to her childish behavior, the way she never told Sasuke until it was far too late. Sure, she had fucked a few guys to get over him eventually - but the only way she gained any leverage initially, was confronting him directly.

Could she do that?

Was she willing to lose that?

Or really, was she willing to spend the next however long crying every night like this?

She pulled herself up, dusted herself offf - punched a tree in half. She was Sakura fucking Haruno, and she was way too much of an adult to need any man, any substance, or anything else. She had fought world ending entities for christ's sake!

She set out for Sasuke, but was planning on making a pit stop once she found Kakashi.

He may have surpressed his chakra, but Naruto could sense him miles away. He would no doubt find Sasuke before Kakashi could. When he did, he dodged the kunai chucked half-heartedly his way. Ignored the elbow to his gut, or the fist that he narrowly dodged and pulled the brunette into his arms. "I'm an idiot," he murmured, "I'm an idiot and this is the worst apology ever, but I have to make this right for them. I should have trusted you."

Sasuke huffed. "Emotional depth of a kiddie pool."

"A really deep one! Like dangerously deep, like our kids won't be going in that kiddie pool, no way, no how."

Sasuke tried to bite back a laugh, but Naruto persisted. "Man, I might even drown in it. And you know me, I never fail, believe it!" Sasuke let out a chuckle. "Oh thank god, you're so handsome when you smile." He could sense Kakashi's chakra getting nearer. "I think you know where this all ends."

"Ah, for us? Where else. Idiot."

Sakura felt his chakra and Sasuke's both off in the distance. Heels hot, she was making good time - she wasn't surprised she was heading toward the Valley of the End. Where else would Sasuke go to hide? When she approached the edge of the forest, his chakra vanished. Entering the clearing, a little winded, she found only Kakashi.

"I think we've been set up," Kakashi looked out over the lake spilling past the statues. Sakura walked to his side, puzzled. He sighed. "Our friends are... a special kind."

"I don't follow," Sakura looked up at his face, completely entranced with his grin.

Just then, a loud rumble shook through the lake, splitting the water down the middle - somehow held in place. "Shikamaru that's awesome!" Ino beamed, but he couldn't even focus on answering her. Shadow jutsu was not meant to be used on very fluid objects. This was painful.

Kakashi looked at Sakura, then stepped into the now path, offering her his hand to help her down the step. Their fingers touching sent electricity through her whole body, shorting out her brain, sparks flying as she rushed to live in the moment. They walked forward, eventually greated by a large paper hawk flying their way. It dipped its head and sat, suggesting the two climb on. Sakura went first, tensing as she felt Kakashi climb on, settling in against her back. The bird took flight just as the water collapsed with Shikamaru. Ino set to work on healing him and his over extended limbs.

"Kakashi... I'm sorry for last night. To be honest, I- This is so embarassing but..."

"Sakura." He put a hand under her chin, forcing her to look at him. "You need to stop apologizing."

Just then, a gust of cool air met them as the hawk passed over the edge where the lake ended and the waterfall began, giving them a clear view of the valley below and the moon and stars glistening off the lake. "Wow," she said. "Wow is right," Kakashi laughed. "It's like something out of Icha Icha."

She frowned, giving him a look. "That's the least sexy thing you could say."

"Do you want me to be sexy?" He pressed against her, and she blushed. "It's not all _porn_ you know."

She waved him off. His hands settled on her waist, and if she hadn't felt so absolutely happy, she would've melted right off the hawk. Things... made sense now. They didn't, but they did. One by one, the answers came, maybe, that was easier. His hands were on her hips. They were alone in the moonlight. She was in love.

They were aware of the genjutsu when they were put under it, the sun suddenly rising slowly over the horizon despite it being only nine at night. Still, seeing the sunrise from here... She wasn't surprised Sasuke had been able to paint it so convincingly, how many time had he and Naruto seen the sunset and rise here? He probably had it etched in his mind as fondly as Naruto's face.

"Sakura. I have a confession to make." He tried to be serious, but a laugh escaped at the end. She laughed too, "I think I know what you're gonna say."

"Oh come on," Kakashi twisted his arms to signal she should turn around to face him, "Now I've got to be unpredictable. I have to confess that..." He thought really hard, "I confess.. Even though I act like I don't care, I train very hard to beat Gai."

"Oh, what a confession," Sakura laughed, "That's like confessing you're a dog guy and not a cat guy."

"I confess.." He pulled her a little closer, even leaned his face in a little, "My favorite food is actually cake, but I had a weight issue as a toddler and refuse to let myself eat it or I'll eat the whole thing."

He settled back, and she huffed. "Anything else?"

"I confess I've had feelings for this girl," He stared out over the daybreak horizon, a whistful smile on his lips, nervous hand in his hair; "But she's far too out of my league for me to tell her that."

"That's so funny," Sakura grinned, "I've had this crush on a guy but he's like, in charge of a bunch of people and super suave and makes me unable to talk when he's around, so usually I just cry and run away."

"Ah, but you're talking to me, so who's the lucky guy?" Kakashi winked, and she rolled her eyes. "Atleast you don't throw up around him, I do that near the girl I like."

"A girl who makes your throw up? She must be a real winner."

"Could they just kiss already?!" Naruto was waving his arms on the ground, Sasuke focusing on his genjutsu, Sai focused on not accidentally dematerializing his hawk and sending them into a lake.

"Sakura-chan. I would never want to be forward," He added playfully, "Though you did invite me to stay the night already..." She hit him, "May I.. kiss you?"

She didn't answer. The butterflies in her stomach had her soaring on cloud 9, and she went for it. She kissed him so hard, they nearly tumbled from the hawk, but Kakashi steadied them, both hands gripping at her waist, bringing her as physically close as he possibly could. When they broke apart, he was breathless. Absolutely beside himself, teary eyed and child-like. His chest was about to explode. Her lips were softer than he could imagine. The curve of her hips so round, so firm.. He pressed his mouth upon hers again, willing to suffocate in her if it meant he never had to break away.

"Well you got what you asked for," Ino rolled her eyes at Naruto's grossed out face as he watched them get -very- friendly. From the ground, his eyes eventually drifted from the two to the man he had fought and fought for. His face was stern and concentrated, orchestrating the genjutsu show for the couple. Naruto was so taken aback; He was still getting used to being able to look at Sasuke for long periods of time, and he took this moment to take in everything from his firm stance, strong shoulders, sharp jaw, brilliant mystical eyes. He was so afraid of losing it, maybe some of his childish defense mechanisms were still there. They had so much learning to do. So much growing. He would water their relationship every day. Their roots would be the foundation for a whole new era of peace. He swore it.

"This is..." Sakura, laying back against the hawk, Kakashi pressed against her, found herself misty eyed. This felt too good to be real. "..Unexpected. I don't know what else to say. I felt so.. silly," She was crying before she could tell herself it was stupid to cry, "You're way out of my league."

"You are the greatest medical ninja the world has ever seen, the best cook I've ever had the pleasure of baking along side," She laughed through her tears at that one, "And the most beautiful woman I have ever had the euphoric experience of kissing. Speaking of," He pressed his lips to her once more, "I'm not quite ready to stop doing that."

She smiled, leaning up to kiss him. Suddenly, the genjutsu changed, and they were no longer over the lake. They were soaring (in reality, probably in circles) through a changing landscape of beautiful places, from hanging gardens in Kusa to snow covered trees and glowing hubs in the mountains of the Land of Frost; ancient temples in Iwa, and red desserts in the south most part of the Land of Wind.

Naruto too found himself suddenly captured in the genjutsu, and he knew that Sasuke was showing them all something incredibly personal; the most beautiful parts of his journey. Sourcing ove the Land of Whirpools, through the thunderstorms of the Land of Lightning, Naruto felt like they had never left each other. Sakura, who had been trapped in the village for years, felt like she was seeing the world. Kakashi understood Sasuke's need for his silence and freedom. Sasuke felt like this was a part of him he wasn't sure he could ever describe in words, and was glad he could show them all.

Finally, the genjutsu took them to the outskirts of Konoha, looking over the village dusted with cherry blossoms in the early light; sun reflecting off of the Hokage Mountain, making Kakashi blush ever so slightly. Sakura looked at him with pride, but all four of them appreciated the beauty of their village. This was the important last stop. Sasuke was home, and so were they; Released from the genjutsu and surrounded by night, the two nin on the hawk looked down at where they could see their comrades below. Tsunade, who had been lurking in the shadows, turned and left silently, small smile on her lips. Yes, she hadn't gotten her happy ending, but Sakura had gotten hers. The joy overwhelmed her. Shikamaru, who had collapsed from his strain, rubbed his temples and looked at Ino who was healing him, happy that she was happy with Sai, his teammate often restless and unsure of herself behind a facade of utter confidence and decadence. Happy that he had repaid his debts, that soon, he would get a beautiful wedding and be able to look at the love of his life the way those two did tonight. Sai set the hawk down not far from everyone.

Kakashi wouldn't let her go, not now, nor ever. When he bowed deeply to his former students and fellow ninja, he did it with her hand firmly entwined in his, showing his deepest respects for the ninja who had planned something absolutely beautiful for them, even if their meddling may have caused some trouble of their own. Ino pulled Shikamaru up and the three departed, knowing their work was done. Naruto walked up to the two and hugged them tightly. All three were surprised when they felt Sasuke wrap his arms around them too. Team 7 was closer than they ever were before, and finally - after years of warlessness, the four knew the true meaning of peace.

Souls by nature wander, but no soul is truly ever lost.

-x-x-x-

There will be an epilogue to the story! I hope you enjoyed the fluff. the angst, the crack and silliness. This was supposed to eventually have some smut (hence the M rating) but I thought this chapter was much more beautiful without it. I'll probably write a one-off about it, if people are so inclined to ask ;) I always think about the positive and practical uses of ninjutsu/genjutsu post war and this was something I thought Sasuke would do, as a man of few words as it is. To show it to all of them signifies his true love for all three of them and the fact that their bond, although individually stronger amongst each other, will always be stronger than any other bond in their lives. Thank you for all your reviews, and expect several more fics coming, I'll post those details when the epilogue goes up xxx


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